this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2024
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[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 49 points 3 months ago (2 children)

The Germans have specifically ruled out doing East Prussia again, for the same reason a recovering alcoholic won’t touch a drop of wine. Which leaves two options: Králiveč, the Czech exclave with a beer pipeline to the mainland*, or the more mundane option of partitioning it somehow between Poland and Lithuania.

* which should probably be named in honour of Immanuel Kant, a famous local reputed to have been a real pissant who was very rarely stable

[–] Ooops 48 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (3 children)

Germans are still suffering from having to integrate another failed quasi-soviet state more than 30 years later, so you couldn't pay them enough for taking Königsberg back.

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 26 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Though having instantly given citizenship to thousands of Russians on the grounds that their ancestors around the time of Catherine the Great were German, and ending up with a monolingually Russophone voting bloc that gets its news from Russian state TV, did them no favours either. Jus sanguinis: not even once.

[–] IkarusHagen2 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Wait, we germans take königsberg back and throw the russians out and just make it a nice patch of land for bavarians. We gain a beautiful countryside in mainland germany and könich maggus can have königsberg to make average bavarian things

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 3 points 3 months ago

When has Germany ethnically cleansing Slavs ever gone wrong?

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 5 points 3 months ago

Interesting. I wonder how long you have to live in the former USSR to qualify.

[–] Ozymandias1688 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

As a german, I heartily agree. Poland and or Czechia, you are welcome to any or all parts of it. Just don't fight over it :)

[–] AGuyAcrossTheInternet@fedia.io 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

However, it would be somewhat entertaining to see the AfD melting down over getting it back. On the one hand, you have some of the old territory back, but on the other hand, there's so many foreigners getting your nationality now…

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 10 points 3 months ago

Given that AfD are Putinists and a significant proportion of the foreigners are Russian military personnel, I suspect they wouldn’t have a huge problem with it.

[–] psud@aussie.zone 1 points 3 months ago

Heidegger was a boozy beggar and he could think him under the table. Should've been named for him.

[–] Damage@slrpnk.net 22 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I think everyone wants to be rid of Russia's influence there, but I don't think anyone actually wants to deal with the aftermath

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 19 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Honestly that describes mainland Russia too.

[–] rustyfish@lemmy.world 16 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Yo! Poland! Do ~~your~~ the thing.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech 14 points 3 months ago (2 children)

The Polish thing is being split between Germany and Russia again

[–] riodoro1@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Hey, shut your mouth or we’ll take Zaolzie again.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech 2 points 3 months ago

You can have it. It's a blight on the land and I wouldn't even demand anything in return, not even closing down Turów or retreating from that random chapel.

[–] Pringles@lemm.ee 4 points 3 months ago

And Austria, don't forget that they behave politically as still being a superpower. Just a village in Silesia will probably suffice.

[–] mozz@mbin.grits.dev 14 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I am not European enough to make any sense of this meme

[–] DaddleDew@lemmy.world 32 points 3 months ago (3 children)

It implies that Kaliningrad is left undefended and up for the taking and that the surrounding countries are all looking at each other wondering which one of them is going to make a move on it.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech 25 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

Germany and Czechia are not surrounding countries but Kaliningrad (then named Královec) was founded by Czech king Přemysl Otakar II. at the height of the Bohemian empire, and was later part of Prussia (basically Germany in the 1800s).

I don't think many Germans are joking about annexing Kaliningrad because of the WWII stigma but Czech redditors regularly invade r/Kaliningrad only to get promptly banned.

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 months ago
[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 1 points 3 months ago

They only need one successful invasion!

[–] mozz@mbin.grits.dev 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Zipitydew@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 months ago

Tis a silly place

[–] Kaput@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Anybody thought about asking the residents?

[–] eestileib@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 months ago

The residents are all smacked out and drooling into their methanol-laced vodka.

[–] where_am_i@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)
  1. buy a geopolitical map and hang it above your desk
  2. join !yurop@lemm.ee
[–] mozz@mbin.grits.dev 3 points 3 months ago
  1. I will not
  2. Done thank you
[–] resetbypeer@lemmy.world 14 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (3 children)

Next week: Kaliningrad named back to its original name: Königsberg~~er~~

[–] Lupus 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Königsberg~~er~~

Now I'm hungry

[–] taladar@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 months ago

Königsberg

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 3 points 3 months ago

Surely nothing has ever gone wrong with Germany staking historical claims in the area

[–] DarkThoughts@fedia.io 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Minarble@aussie.zone 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That’s not a bad idea! Throw in Transnitia, North Georgia, Kursk and baby you got a stew going!

[–] DarkThoughts@fedia.io 3 points 3 months ago

The thing about Kaliningrad is that Russia would have no way of reinforcing it. If Ukraine occupied it, they could only move there via boat, since it is surrounded by NATO countries. That makes it incredibly easy to defend, especially if they move some sea and air drones over there.

[–] Technus@lemmy.zip 6 points 3 months ago

I feel like Barbossa would be Germany cause he used to be the bad guy but now he's cool.