Ask Lemmy

Why do you get to have an opinion on something between two strangers that otherwise doesn’t affect you

My point is money should not be the purpose.

Take this and apply it literally every aspect of western culture. It seems like you personally have strong feelings about how you think sex should be, but there are many, many people who disagree. We live in a society, I say mind your own business if someone's doing something you don't like that also doesn't affect you

Out of curiosity, why does sex need a purpose? Why should it be or not be for anything in particular? What makes it any different from, say, juggling?

Sex work isn't just prostitution, by the way. It's anyone making a living off of sexual content. If you're shooting porn or are a cam girl, you're a sex worker as well.

Prostitution is problematic in that currently, because it's an illegal service, it's largely being performed by people who don't have a choice in the matter. Human trafficking is a huge problem. If prostitution were legalized and regulated, if the societal "we" changed our collective attitudes towards it, life would improve for a lot of people. I struggle to phrase this next bit in a tactful way. If you're against improving the lives of so many people because it doesn't align with your view of sex should be for, that's pretty shitty of you. Not saying that's the case, I don't live inside your head, but that's how I see it.

Office workers also sell their bodies.

Builders sell their bodies too.

Sex work is no different than any other line of work.

Adults have the abillity to engage in free enterprise, as long as all parties involved consent I see no issue.

Regarding sex, the only times you get to have oppinions about another persons sex life is...

...when you are part of it.

...when it involves underage people.

Why should money be a taboo reason to have sex? You don't get to pick and choose what motivation other people have for sex.

You don't have to engage with this type of enterprise if you don't want to, so leave other's alone.

In general, prostitution will allways happen, you can try whatever laws you want, but you can't stop it. The only thing prohibition acomplishes is to deny sex workers the protections they need to stay safe.

Regulate it, keep the workers safe, ensure they're well compensated and tested. Basically, treat is like every other profession.

If two consenting adults want to exchange money for sexual favors, who cares? If the worker chooses to sell their body for money via sexual acts, why is that inherently worse than someone who does construction selling their body for a living?

I think if it doesn’t affect other people, and nobody is being exploited/everyone is participating willingly, then it’s none of my business what others choose to do.

I’m actually trying to help sex workers, particularly porn Creators, use the fediverse to take control of their social media. I want to help them keep control of their own destiny - https://xxxiver.se

There are two main "career paths" here:

• Those that willingly choose sex work.
• Those that are pressured into sex work.

Imo, the former is perfectly fine (because everyone involved is consenting). The latter is problematic and the actual problem we need to solve.

So many people conflate the two and assume that all sex work is exploitation. All mixed in with the implicit sexism that says women shouldn't have any autonomy over their own body and sexuality.

This is where a good ol' "hate the game, not the player" applies.

I have no judgement of the people who do it to make money. Any issue I have is with the economy and culture that drives some to do it to survive when they wouldn't otherwise choose to.

Your point about money shouldn't be the purpose... but some people, especially women, are stuck where sex work is their best paying option. It's not their fault.

In a perfect world where no one is forced to do any particular labor to survive, when consent is given 100% of the time, and everyone's safe, I have zero issue with sex work from any angle. In this imperfect world, my issue is with the system and not the individuals working in the industry.

Sex trafficking or impoverished/addicted people turning to sex work, no. Society has failed them and we need to fix the underlying problems.

Sex work as a concept I take no issue with. I think it solves a lot of problems interpersonally. Dating would improve with less need for people to hide their motives. People too busy or uninterested in relationships would have an outlet, and disabled people who otherwise can't attract a partner benefit greatly as well.

Sure it'd be great if basic needs like food, shelter, healthcare and yes, sex, weren't commoditized, but until we get ~~Sexicaid~~ Sexicare for All, I'm fine with people making money from sex and paying for it. Legalize and regulate it for the safety of the workers and the customers.

~~^Someone please come up with a better name than Sexicaid^~~

I like looking at pictures of naked people, so I'm grateful to those naked people.

I don't judge at all. Not all sex work is sex for money, but even in that case, I think it's fine. There's nothing magical about sex. And there can be lots of reasons a person might not get all their needs met within a relationship.

I do worry it can be a trap for some, but I think it's a valid choice. Idk. I'm specialized (trapped) in IT work and whore myself out to corporations for money. Ultimately there probably isn't that much of a difference.

Eh, it's just a service in exchange for money. Just like a massage parlour or spa or doctor or chiropractor or hair stylist. Sex isn't special.

Totally fine with sex work. Just keep it safe and be nice.

I don't guess it needs my approval but as long as there is a demand for the service it will happen.

Like you, I just like everyone to get sex for sex, that's how I've always done it, but that's a very recent outlook, it was very gatekept before and women generally were trading sex for something, and men were generally trading something for it. I remember being in high school and the only categories were girlfriend, slut, or just don't have sex, it was so fraught.

I expect there may always be a marketplace. And certainly don't hold any sort of bad feelings towards those trying to market themselves, if you can make a living at it, great.

Went to barber school with a lady who was doing job retraining after getting busted for prostitution. She said she really had enjoyed it, had few clients, all regulars, worked out of her home, made a good living. Wasn't bothering anyone until apparently someone noticed and was bothered.

I have no stake in anything sex related, but I've known others which can be described as insatiable. If they are willing and able to do that for of work, then what's the harm?

Do you not believe in casual, not romantic sex?

It's a type of entertainment. As long as the people involved are of legal age and gave consent... I don't see a problem with it

It is also called the world's oldest business. They have done it long before I could ever judge it, and they will continue afterwards, whatever my judgement may be.

Do I "approve" of sex work? It's not my place to either approve or disapprove of what other people do with their time, their money or their bodies. The question is loaded to provide justification for your moral outrage.

Not my business, but would hope appropriate precautions are in place for both parties involved.

I approve of it in that it's legitimate work, unlike being a landlord, and lots of vulnerable people end up doing it as the only method of supporting themselves, as well as a lot of single moms trying to deal with making an income and parenting, etc. I would not disparage anyone doing it. Would I worry about their emotional and physical health and safety doing it? Yes. We have a sex workers collective drop-in center in my city who make efforts to try to help keep them safe, such as testing, condoms, etc, which is great. But I can't help but wonder how someone's mental health would be affected by just being a glorified blow up doll. There was an Ask Reddit once about what people saw on porn sets, and someone who worked on one said all the girls seemed really fake and unhappy and vacant emotionally, and that concerns me. I would not want anyone hurt by doing this work is my point, but I don't object to them doing it of course. Just please take care of yourself!

Edit to add: last weekend my church took a potluck to the local park where there is a small tent encampment of unhoused folks and invited them to eat with us, which they did, which was nice, and although they were shy we all talked a little, and some of them were clearly sex workers from what they talked about. One had what I think was scabies on her skin, and that's the kind of thing that worries me.

Personally i am ok with sex being for money, as long as its a choice. Nobody should be forced into sex work. One can say that work by definition is exploitation but if one has multiple work options and they choose sex work as a line of work, i am ok with it being an option.

I like this answer, but he deleted. It's still in my inbox so I'm gonna share but not mention the commentor's name

In germany sex Work is a normal regulated job like any other. You are insured, receive vacation days, etc. It is accepted here as completely normal work like any other. Because it is. was once in a brothel with a friend. While he was in the room with a lady, talked to the others and asked why they were doing this job. The answer was "I like dicks" and "Its fun and pays very well" To be honest, the ladies seem to enjoy their work more (and earn a lot more) than any job I've had in my life.

I would never use those services. There is nothing wrong in offering them but I think there is something abusive in accepting the offer. Surely some people do it 100% because they love the work but I am fairly certain that most don't. And those who don't, won't tell you that they don't. So if you accept the service, you might abuse someone's desperation.

The choice/situation blends in with every occupation so as long as no aggression or wrongful leverage is involved.