This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
be me
get laughed at for showing toy firetruck at school
dad wakes me up for drive to school
pass school
"dad where are we going"
"my friends want to meet you anon"
pull up to schoolmate's house
it's on fire
the firefighters are there
get to see my enemies die screaming while burning
get to see a real fire truck
mfw my dad took a day off to do a little arson to make me feel better
go to visit my dad in prison
he asked me to smuggle in some cocaine
I hide it in my firetruck
give him the firetruck
he hides the firetruck in his ass
all the other inmates make fun of him for hiding a firetruck in his ass
he builds a prison gang drug empire
he has everyone that laughed at him killed
now my firetruck smells funny
Anon needs to sit straight when taking screenshots
be me
average 4chan user
love reading and sharing greentext stories
take screenshots of the best ones to save for later
notice one day that a screenshot seems slightly tilted
think it's just my imagination
days pass, more screenshots seem off
angles get worse, barely noticeable but there
try rotating my phone, doesn't help
open screenshots on my computer, same issue
post about it on /x/, get mocked and called a noob
start getting obsessed, spend hours comparing, measuring angles
losing sleep, seeing the tilt in my dreams
one morning, wake up, entire room looks tilted
try to walk, stumble and fall
look out the window, world looks upside down
panic, try to grab onto something stable
mother staring at me like I’m crazy
feel like I’m in a nightmare
lock the door
look at my screenshots, they’re completely upside down
see my reflection in the monitor, it’s me but inverted
can't take it anymore
scream, try to shut down the computer
power button doesn’t work, can’t unplug it
everything in my apartment starts spinning
fall to the floor, clutching my head
world fades to black
wake up in a padded white room
see a pen in front of me
draw greentext arrows on the walls, but they all look tilted
Wait wtf, the image is tilted? How does that even happen?
The top right corner is darker than the top left corner, I’m guessing that is a photo of a screen
i had this happen to me while working IT:
user has problem.
User takes a picture of error message on phone. User sends photo to her email. User Downloads photo from email. User creates word document. User loads photo into the word document.
User prints word document. User sends the printed document to my office by internal mail. Document arrives next day. User calls me to make sure I got it, and explains her issue to me over the phone. Error message she took a picture of is just completely useless information that didn't help me when troubleshooting issue.
A way to fool anti repost filters maybe.
Much like corn, it was crop rotation
Lol! Nice one
It's a new Windows 11 feature. If you press Ctrl+Shift+Alt+L it will let you rotate your windows for more flexible placement on screen.
Pressing X to doubt. Not because it's a dumb idea (because I wouldn't put that past them), but because Microsoft is seemingly getting rid of every keyboard shortcut that doesn't involve the windows key.
That is a legit shortcut, but it does something far more stupid than rotating screens. It's actually ctrl + shift + win + alt + L
Shoot, I forgot the Win key.
Ngl, I still have the fire truck I got when I was five.
Only reason I didn't become a fireman was getting convinced I could do stuff in nursing that I was better at and help more people than I would as a mediocre fireman.
I dunno if it was true or not, but it ended up relatively good overall, so I ain't mad.
But shit, I got to ride in the trucks a few times anyway. My uncle was a volunteer fireman in the next town over, so as a kid I got rides when things were slow. Even went a few times as an adult on actual calls, though that wasn't supposed to happen lol.
Just as long as you enjoy what you're doing. Hope you enjoy your career in nursing.
Anon loves his dad.
FTFY
I don't care if this is "fake" nor "gay", it is wholesome.
What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck!
Oh great, now I wanna fuck a firetruck.
HONK HONK
Don't let your dreams be dreams!