Ask Lemmy

Dementia

Extinction. Our technology gives us the power of gods, but we still have the brains of hunter-gatherers optimised for living in tribes of less than 150 people. My own death doesn't worry me, I'm not bothered by knowing I'll be forgotten, but the possibility that there might not be anyone to carry on is what I think about at 3 AM when I can't sleep.

Dementia.

My mother has dementia.

Every time I forget something I know I should know it terrifies me.

My biggest fear is that my office chair might break in such a way that the hydraulic piston breaks through the seat and punctures my colon.

Having to work for another 20 years.

The speed at which we are (not) acting on climate change. Our tolerance for neoliberals/capitalists absolutely wiping their arse with the whole planet.

I was in this crystal clear cliffside cove and could see in front of me maybe 10 m or so but the Rock only went out about 5 and then just plunged into the abyss. and after exploring the coastline I swim out about 10 ft past the rocks and realized that I could see nothing but the deepest blue I'd ever seen.

literally anything could be just a few body lengths away watching me were sensing me, it was almost overwhelming.

I felt this visceral terror, that I've felt before in the middle of reading a Lovecraft story.

very much looking into the eye of something unknowable.

Being eternally trapped in a mental prison. Imagine having a panic attack that never ends. I'm pretty sure that type of prolonged stress would cause a psychotic break where your psyche fractures and you become a despondent shell. You would become deathly afraid of everything, even the people you love, because of an unceasing paranoia. That basically sounds like hell to me.

I'm not really afraid of the idea of nothingness after death, because at least then I am released from the torment of living.

Micro-plastics

That what ultimately ends my time here, will be my own fault.

And spiders... Fuck spiders.

The idea of living as if my life hadn't really started yet and then one day realizing I'm old and I wasted my life.

Everything. Everything scares me. If I stop and think about anything in particular, I slowly realize how frightening that thing really is.

Cat. Sits with its ass on your face while you sleep.

Dog. Eats its own vomit and greets others by sniffing their ass, then tries to lick you.

shivers

A hypothetical fear of course, one with my wife who I've been with for 15 years now.

One day, maybe hopefully 30-50 years in the future, my wife and I look back and think about how good our lives were. We raised happy and successful kids. We bought a house. We had dozens of pets. We celebrate the end of our life together. But she doesn't make it.

And I have to spend the final years alone with memories of her. Two controllers. Two spoons. Two of everything for decades. Now just me.

And Never being able to explain to the rest of the world how amazing she was.

Dental pain. Experienced it once and that was enough to give me lifetime nightmares. Absolute horror!

Letting down people I love somehow

People, dying without ever been loved by a woman. Both of those are related.

I don't really know how to describe it, but it's like I go through life just waiting for the other shoe to drop. When something shocking or remotely dangerous happens, my brain automatically assumes the worst is going to happen and I like go into survival mode. I get filled with such dread.

I'm afraid I'll live my whole life in fear like I'm doing now, that I'll never experience love, that one day I'll wake up old and alone, in misery and just waiting to die but too afraid end it.

Your fear of disappearing resonates the worst for me in regards to my daughter (4) doing so. It makes me want to vomit to think of her just gone, at the mercy of someone or something else, with no way to know where she is or how to save her. It rips my heart in half that so many parents throughout time have lived this exact nightmare and never received answers. I find some relief that I live in a very safe part of the world where child abductions rarely (if ever) happen, but there are a number of other ways your little girl can just vanish.

I wouldn't say this perpetually weighs on my conscience, but every time I remember it can happen, it really fucks with my head.

Humanity. I know it's kind of self-defeating or something, but humanity just scares the shit out of me.

The fact I won't be able to retire. I don't have the money because of financial abuse from my SO. I honestly don't know what I'll ever do. People in my city are living in tents in the park and I assume I will have to do that. I'll have a good pension but it won't be enough for the cost of living as it is now.

(Please don't suggest I leave, as kind as you all are, I cannot afford it).

My temper