this post was submitted on 08 Aug 2024
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politics

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[–] kvasir476@lemmy.world 193 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Why are they not talking about couches? What have they got to hide? Seems kinda suspicious.

[–] aaron@lemm.ee 55 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I agree. It seems like something you'd deny outright. It raises questions about whether or not Trump is a couch-fucker, or if MAGA republicans endorse couch-fucking. Is this their political agenda? To fuck my couch? Or your couch? Are they recruiting my furniture into their couch-fucking culture? There are a lot of questions here.

[–] kvasir476@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Probably gonna need a congressional inquiry to get to the bottom of this one.

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[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I found some instructional material that might be helpful to Vance

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[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 121 points 1 month ago (2 children)

This was just a silly joke that got WAY out of hand. The author isn’t even trying to claim it’s real. Getting defensive and angry is the worst possible way to respond - therefore, I hope they keep doing it.

[–] usernamesAreTricky@lemmy.ml 41 points 1 month ago (4 children)

It would be something to see a headline about JD Vance denying having relations with a couch

Wonder if it'll happen

[–] hddsx@lemmy.ca 37 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I did not have sexual relations with that couch

[–] Meron35@lemmy.world 32 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I did not have sexual relations with that couch

I did not have sexual relations with that couch

I did not have sexual relations with that couch

I did not have sexual relations with that couch

I did not have sexual relations with that couch

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[–] usernamesAreTricky@lemmy.ml 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"It depends on what the meaning of the word ~~'is'~~ couch, is"

[–] EmpathicVagrant@lemmy.world 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Not to completion, at least.

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[–] aaron@lemm.ee 23 points 1 month ago (2 children)

You think fucking couches is a joke? Furniture abortions are at an all-time high and you think it's some kind of silly joke?

[–] WindyRebel@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago

Come on. You and I both know that those stats are cushioned.

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[–] OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world 107 points 1 month ago (3 children)

“We do not want to risk Mr. Vance getting an erection on stage.”

[–] HWK_290@lemmy.world 24 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Interviewer: Please, take a seat

JD: Ummm, here? Really?

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[–] Kowowow@lemmy.ca 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Oh please can we incept some weird mental link in his head between coaches and sex, I say send fan art

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[–] GBU_28@lemm.ee 105 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You don't have to talk to em, you just walk right up and grab em by the cushy

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago
[–] aturtlesdream@lemmy.world 68 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Apparently, the only way to get under their skin is to sink down to their level a bit. It's funny how much attention some of this stuff actually got. They are just so weird!

[–] SGforce@lemmy.ca 51 points 1 month ago (15 children)

It's not even close to sinking to their level. This shit is harmless. That makes it especially hilarious to see them blow a gasket over something so lame. Trump wants to take his ball and go home.

[–] Drunemeton@lemmy.world 19 points 1 month ago (2 children)

No, convicted felon, and genuinely weird creepy Donald Trump, will take your ball and go home.

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[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 57 points 1 month ago (7 children)

"We're not going to talk about couches or coconuts or whatever weird fetish KamalaHQ is into," Cheung said, also referencing the coconut memes associated with Harris' political persona. "When we have something to say, we'll say loud and clear. If Kamala is a coward, we'll call her a coward. If Tim Walz is a liar, we'll call him a liar."

Weird way to not talk about couches bro.

[–] Davel23@fedia.io 44 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Wait, lying is a problem now? Somebody better let Trump know.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 25 points 1 month ago

Lying is only a problem if you’re a Democrat.

If you’re a republican they expect you to.

[–] usernamesAreTricky@lemmy.ml 19 points 1 month ago

when we have something to say, we'll say it loud and clear

Uh huh, like calling her a "DEI hire". Or maybe the implied racism is sufficiently loud and clear for them

[–] BlucifersVeinyAnus@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It’s really a lot of couch talk for a campaign declaring no couch talk 🤷‍♂️

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[–] DogPeePoo@lemm.ee 54 points 1 month ago (2 children)

C’mon Vance, don’t be a La-Z-Boy, answer the questions about your sectionality

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[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 54 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That’s ok because the rest of us are having great fun discussing it because it’s sofa king hilarious

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[–] Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de 42 points 1 month ago

I understand, I don't like when people bring up my ex either.

[–] No_Eponym@lemmy.ca 42 points 1 month ago (1 children)

🎶We don't talk about couches, no no no🎶

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[–] Minarble@aussie.zone 38 points 1 month ago (5 children)

That’s because Flipper Vance is getting too much attention with all this couch action.

Anyday now Trump will crack and announce that he had lots of couches back in his day more than anyone and when your rich they let you do it to their couches with tears in their eyes saying thank you sir. Big strong men with big strong couches. Some of them were on the younger side to be sure but they liked the couches as much as I did.

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[–] todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You're not supposed to announce that you're not going to talk about something...

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[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Narrator: “they’re totally going to talk about couches.”

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[–] boaratio@lemmy.world 35 points 1 month ago

Vladimir Futon.

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 34 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"I did not have sexual relations with that settee!"

[–] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 29 points 1 month ago

Sectional relations

[–] SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone 34 points 1 month ago

From the article:

That's spurred criticism from the right that — even if the meme is tongue-in-cheek — Democrats are spreading baseless lies about one of their political opponents.

Because the Republicans would never stoop to such a low!

[–] just_another_person@lemmy.world 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The fact they even have to say this in a PR release....WOW!

[–] usernamesAreTricky@lemmy.ml 31 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Imagine being the person who just made a small little joke online that's now changed the direction of the election in a way

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[–] ZhaoYadang@lemmy.world 33 points 1 month ago (4 children)

“Not going to talk about couches”? Oh yes you are. You’ve been hoisted by your own petard, and you’re gonna stay up there till we decide to take you down (we won’t, you deserve it).

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 25 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Trump campaign refuses to deny that Vance sexually assaulted a love seat

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[–] art@lemmy.world 32 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Wow. Their silence on couches is deafening. WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO HIDE?!

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 28 points 1 month ago

We're gonna talk about them endlessly.

[–] FerroMeow@lemmy.world 28 points 1 month ago (6 children)

Hmm curious why would Trump campaign hide this info from the voters?? Did Vance really fuck the couches and the internet just guessed right????

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[–] MushuChupacabra@lemmy.world 27 points 1 month ago

Convicted felon Donald Project 2025 Trump's campaign says it's 'not going to talk about couches', in reference to JD Couch Fucker Vance

[–] bquintb@midwest.social 25 points 1 month ago (4 children)
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[–] fox2263@lemmy.world 24 points 1 month ago

COUCHES are being used in SCHOOLS to FORCE kids to have sex! We need to BAN these sick perverted couches. THEY want your children to stop having kids.

GET THEM OUT OF SCHOOLS

Or something deranged like that.

[–] 58008@lemmy.world 21 points 1 month ago

If their voters are willing to wear t-shirts saying "real men wear diapers", we need to get in on this racket and sell "real men fuck couches" and "better a couch-fucker than a Democrat!" shirts, then after a certain threshold of sales and enough time for Vance and Trump to notice and comment on the phenomenon, we can reveal that the profits are being donated to Kamala and that every shirt sold has a secret message written around the image in a tiny font that says "if you can read this, you're a fucking moron".

[–] snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (8 children)
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[–] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 18 points 1 month ago

Don't worry, we'll talk about it for you

[–] recapitated@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago

Sounds like it just did

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