this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2024
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[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 53 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Defense Councel:

Objection, lacks foundation, irrelevant line of questions, this line of questioning will soon call for speculation.

Judge: Sustained.

Prosecutory Counsel: Why?

Judge: Don't make me hold you in contempt Mr. Toddler.

[–] Klear@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 week ago

Bailiff, escort Mr. Toddler out, muzzle him if necessary.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 38 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] Hupf 11 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Bach37strad@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Something something mitochondria

[–] palordrolap@fedia.io 32 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

"I don't know"

"why"

"because it is not possible to know everything"

"why"

(infinite loop until toddler needs nap.)

[–] skulblaka@sh.itjust.works 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

"Look kid, you've pretty much reached philosophical bedrock here and you're going to need better questions to get better answers. Now go the fuck to sleep."

[–] Entropywins@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] thebestaquaman@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

See answer N-1.

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

(infinite loop until toddler needs nap.)

"The prosecution rests, Your Honor."

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Pssshhhh, more like until I take a nap.

[–] rockSlayer@lemmy.world 25 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I was this way, and then being an undiagnosed autistic 3yo plus 1 too many mild chastisings from my parents made me shy from talking for years. Engage them with a thought provoking flip of the question. "Why do you think food gives us energy?"

[–] Entropywins@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

A quick thought-provoking because is all I got.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

I don't think you're allowed to do that in court, though.

[–] RoquetteQueen@sh.itjust.works 22 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Somehow my children skipped this phase

[–] fahfahfahfah@lemmy.billiam.net 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah none of mine ever did this except MAYBE once or twice after toddlerhood, specifically to annoy me because they knew it was a thing

[–] chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I was definitely this kid. My mom still teases me about it.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago
[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The answer to life the universe and everything

Yeah, I could tell you, but you won't like what you hear.

[–] HatFullOfSky@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

My oldest never hit this, but the younger one who is currently 3 basically matches this comic exactly

[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

More entertainment up options now.

[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago

Isn’t he so cute and itty-bitty in that over sized coat just makes you wanna prosecute whoever he says.

[–] fox2263@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

I often think I should offer the services of my toddler out for terrorist interrogations.

[–] racketlauncher831@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 week ago