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Hold the debate anyway, and if he doesn't show up, replace him with a cardboard cutout with a recording of his greatest hits:
Sharks vs. Batteries
My Uncle The Nuclear Scientist
Inject Bleach
Shine a UV Light Inside the Body
Hannibal Lector is Awesome
Don't forget about magnets!
What do you mean? Everyone knows that magnets don’t work when they get wet
Plus all the Sir stories you can eat. I wish someone would package them into a storybook for adults that is humorous bullshit tales from Trump
Can we work in the Sharpie sketch?
Nuke the hurricanes
Gettysburg.
Don't fight up hill, me boys!
When the North famously fought the leprechauns.
The revolutionary war airports.
Elton John’s organ.
🎵 hold me close with tiny hands, sir!
Planes Can’t Fly When It’s Not Sunny
Lmao wtf is Sharks vs Batteries
I swear every day there's some new nugget with this guy. The firehose is so big it's impossible to keep up
well, you see, electric powered boats are extremely dangerous, because if they capsize, you have to choose whether to stay near the boat and get electrocuted, or swim 10 feet away toward a hungry shark. there are no other options, you see.
lol i wish i was joking
And have the Mexicans pay for it
I think millions of people would watch this. The contrast of Harris vs T**** would be shocking. And a huge issue right now is communication of the issues.
Take a handful of actually important subjects: healthcare/abortion, immigration, climate, democracy/fascism, education, taxes, etc. Let Kamala clearly and concisely explain her/Democrats position. Then "let virtual Donny answer" (play each of his rambling greatest hits; it wouldn't be far off his actual answer). Do this for each subject, like a good old fashioned debate. Make it clear this was not AI or manipulated, but actual quotes.
look at this cool sun. look!
The republicans will try to elect the cardboard cutout in 2028.
If it has a mustache, but only under the nose.
Might make a decent SNL sketch.
The sound from the wind generators cause cancer.
Slow the testing down, please!
When you're a celebrity, they just let you do it.