this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2024
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[–] Skyrmir@lemmy.world 74 points 6 days ago (1 children)

A donut receipt is an alibi. Just saying.

[–] vsoponge@lemmy.world 22 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] lugal@lemmy.ml 11 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Makes me wonder if there is a market for receipts as alibis

[–] dogsnest@lemmy.world 10 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I came here to buy an alibi, and you're trying to sell me wonder.

[–] RQG@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

You'll get an alibi receipt for your alibi receipt btw

[–] lugal@lemmy.ml 6 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

And can sell that receipt to someone else who needs a receipt. It's not a pyramid scheme

[–] onTerryO@lemmy.ca 56 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I used to like Mitch. I still do, but I used to, too.

[–] blattrules@lemmy.world 23 points 6 days ago (1 children)

People either love him or they hate him. Or they think he’s ok.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

Is anyone indifferent?

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

If I have a charge for 7 cents on my work CC and no receipt, I have to go through the seven layers of hell to beg for clemency.

I once spent over an hour trying to get a receipt for a refund that was higher than expected. (error in our companies favor)

[–] gingernate@lemm.ee 2 points 4 days ago

You can buy donuts with you company card? Lucky

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 37 points 6 days ago

Luckily, they're not bringing ink into this, only thermal paper!

[–] learn2swim@lemmy.world 27 points 5 days ago (3 children)
  • Sir, you can't leave without paying for that donut.
  • But I just paid for it! Here's the receipt.

And that's why you need a receipt for a donut.

[–] markstos@lemmy.world 20 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I had a friend who liked to sulk around in a trench coat. He bought a grocery store donut and promptly tossed the receipt.

He was soon stopped by grocery security for theft. After some hassle they tracked down his receipt and let him go, but yeah that’s what donut receipts are for.

[–] meliaesc@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago

You can see how the main issue wasn't the receipt, right?

[–] Johanno 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Quickly stuffs donut into mouth.

Wfathf Donutfff?

[–] Professorozone@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Punches man in stomach. Donut comes out.

[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 days ago (1 children)

eat the chewed donut problem solved

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago

Hold it. Did you pay for that receipt?

[–] FleetingTit 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Do you remember a time where the receipt had the name of the store, the time and date of the purchase, an itemized list of what you bought, and the tax you paid and nothing else?

Nowadays there's also a transaction id, a qr code, a coupon for your next purchase, a quote of the day, a novel, and some ads printed on there. My last order of french fries came with a piece of paper that is longer than my forearm. Ikea spits out half a metre of thermal paper when I order 2 hot dogs. Whyyyu?

[–] DakRalter@thelemmy.club 2 points 4 days ago

What you guys doing over there? Ours are just itemised lists, payment method, and the transaction details etc. And usually a "how did we do" link.

[–] holycrap@lemm.ee 25 points 5 days ago (1 children)

The actual answer is for reimbursement, for example if you're buying them for a work meeting or something.

[–] TheSambassador@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Sure .. but a single donut?

Honestly the process for getting reimbursed is annoying enough that I'm only going to do it for stuff that's more than $10. I don't need to be reimbursed often though

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 1 points 4 days ago

Reimbursement also counts for work issued credit cards. You go on a trip for work, you don't need to pay for anything in my realm :)

[–] Professorozone@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago

I get a receipt for everything, that way if anyone asks if I have the receipt, the answer is always yes, not gee was this one of the things I thought was too inconsequential to keep the receipt for.

Also, if I'm ever audited by the IRS I'm going to inundate them with so many receipts, they'll owe ME money when it's over.

[–] Deconceptualist@lemm.ee 21 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Let me file that under D... for Donut.

[–] ME5SENGER_24@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago

…cause we all know what D is

[–] recklessengagement@lemmy.world 17 points 5 days ago

I usually get a reciept, but that's because I like to scan/archive them and keep track of how prices change over time

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 5 points 4 days ago (3 children)

I never take receipts for food because even if the food is awful, I'm not returning it. They might just serve it to someone else, and I don't want to contribute to that.

[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 6 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

You should take it. Especially nowadays. You'll never know when you might need a solid alibi.

How could I have been getting an abortion? I was across town getting a donut. Jen L was the cashier. She saw me.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 6 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

If I ever need to get an abortion, things are even more fucked up than I thought. I am a man. Though I suspect if men could get pregnant, abortions would be legal without any contestation.

[–] blind3rdeye@lemm.ee 2 points 4 days ago

The receipts for food aren't so that you can return it. They are for expenses record keeping. For example, some jobs have a food allowance; or special tax concessions for food bought while working. But to get those benefits you need to have evidence that you bought the food.

[–] Googlyman64@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

It's a critical health code violation to take the served food back into the kitchen, let alone serve it to another customer. Not that it DOESN'T happen, but it is unlikely.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 1 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I know it happens because I worked at Walmart and many of my coworkers would routinly put returned food back on the shelves from the go back bins when they were supposed to be trashed, because nobody ever wanted to do the trash process or even was told about it (I only knew how and that it was a thing because I would constantly waste time going on the company intraweb and doing lessons on all the positions in the store instead of working).

[–] UnpopularCrow@lemmy.world 18 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Most receipts contain a time stamp. I could imagine a scenario where someone claimed Mitch (if he was still here) was involved in a crime and he could use the donut receipt as proof of innocence.

[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 12 points 6 days ago (1 children)

It's up to the discretion of the judge.

Friend had car stolen. Joyriders caused police chase but they got away. Police arrested friend. He had an ATM receipt time stamped from when the police were chasing the stolen car.

Judge didn't care.

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[–] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 14 points 6 days ago (4 children)

What the actual f-

uck is up with th-

e hyphenation?

[–] Dumbkid@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Looks like tex formatting, they want each line to be the same width, so the badness value for hyphens must have been less than just using bigger spaces, which they also did

[–] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

This explanation sounds very reasonable, and it makes me feel even more disgusted.

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[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

In the USA, business expenses are tax deductible.

[–] qjkxbmwvz@startrek.website 11 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Travel expense reimbursement


though many companies have a "no receipt required if under $xyz" policy.

[–] scops@reddthat.com 7 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Man, I wish that was the case at places I worked at. My last company would give you stipends for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Try to spend that stipend at a convenience store because you don't eat breakfast and just want some coffee and a snack for later? Screw you, we're deducting from your paycheck for that.

I had a coworker who got caught on the wrong side of that policy. Since then, he'd always max out his stipend at every meal. Apps, desserts, etc. He'd get a second entree just to take back to his hotel as long as it wouldn't put him over the limit.

He probably cost the company hundreds extra because they wouldn't reimburse him for a bag of chips one time.

[–] django@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Malicious compliance is a form of art.

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[–] angrystego@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago

I do occasionaly buy a donut, but never for myself. So I cary it around with me for a while, often visiting other shops with it. I'd rather have a receipt with me, don't need any funny experiences.

[–] Braindead@programming.dev 7 points 6 days ago

So, they made the receipt longer?

[–] django@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 5 days ago

I somehow hoped for donut recipes.

[–] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 1 points 4 days ago

The letters look data crushed, I'm high

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