- Try to break your own fingers to get off work, fail
- Try to break your own neck, fail
- Shit your pants
- Open Outlook
this post was submitted on 23 Aug 2024
219 points (98.2% liked)
Programmer Humor
31997 readers
552 users here now
Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)
Rules:
- Posts must be relevant to programming, programmers, or computer science.
- No NSFW content.
- Jokes must be in good taste. No hate speech, bigotry, etc.
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
Pfff, there's barely any double-booking in that calendar.
Source:
I sacrifice myself to the useless meeting altar so that others can focus on actual work in peace.
Once, i had an entire day double booked (plus multiple hours before and after my working hours) and one hour in particular was quadruple booked. People were shouting at me all day about how I wasn't showing up to their meetings, but like... you could see my calendar when you put those appointments on there. That's kind of on you.
I got a talking to from my boss but they didn't reprimand me or anything, it was just "managing these kinds of things is an important part of the job". Eh. They did not pay me enough.
I hear ya.
I get 1-6 meetings in the same time slot, people don't care to check so I don't care to show.
I decide which meetings are important for actually moving stuff forward and screw the rest.
There's only ever one guy who complained to my boss...
I didn't show up for a meeting for a Friday 7pm, invite sent at like 4:58pm the same day for some inane and absolutely not urgent subject.
I saw that invite come in, chuckled, closed my laptop, went home and ignored it.
Later that night, the guy went nuts and CC'd everyone's bosses because he had wasted the full hour and obviously no one showed up to his meeting "even though I made sure to check everyone's calendar and everyone was available and you're all unprofessional".
I don't do emails notifications on phones as a rule unless you wanna pay my rate 24/7, but I had forgotten to do my time sheet so I was logged in doing that...
I dabble in a bit of passive aggressiveness in the face of corporate bullshit, so I finished my timesheet and hit propose new time... Sunday 3:21 am...
"Checked your calendar and it was available. Sorry for the inconvenience."
Closed my laptop and fucked off.
The guy went nuclear over several emails.
Sent a quick email to my boss "Just a heads-up, I think I angered someone by not attending their 7pm meeting they sent at 4:58pm and proposing an equally ridiculous time"
Never heard from the guy again and the next week he wasn't in the company AD anymore.
Probably went full tilt cookie monster in the coke jar or something.
Damn, the full meltdown!
At least in my case I get to click Accept or Decline in the Teams notification or in the mail. So I can decline them minutes after they tried to put it in my calendar.
That's what I do too - if it's a meeting I care about, I make the effort to suggest a different time. Otherwise, just decline. My calendar is visible and up to date, use the fucking scheduling assistant to tell you when I have time ffs.
I was a lowly bottom tier asshole at the time (doing senior work, just didn't get the title) so managers would just put shit on my calendar and assume i would clear everything for their pet project. Then they got upset with me when that didn't happen.
Good.
Lol
I'm not a programmer but I have at least one double booking every day. Some weeks look like a brick wall sideways (they seem to always overlap by a half hour for some reason).
First task on Monday morning... "Who is going to be pissed at me this week?" Go through and decline the least important meetings until I can get through my week without breaking the space-time continuum.
I used to do it Sunday night but decided fuck that - that's my time.
I use the “short meetings” option in gcal, which shortens meetings by 5-10 minutes to give me a passing period between meetings. Twice this week people have had the audacity to try and schedule a meeting in that break. 😬
Jesus fucking Christ. We're all so broken.
Psychopaths!
Someone hasn't learned to block themselves out a lunch hour.
Real professionals eat during meetings.
I schedule an hour for lunch and play video games during meetings.
Do it on a 5 monitor setup with a 2kW subwoofer to make a point.
What's funny is when I space out looking at my other monitor folks in the meeting just assume I'm working.
Real mugs.
Henry Ford invented breaks to extract more out of the peasant Labour.
The fact we're years later and cognitively demanding jobs don't support this well show how amateur managers are and his spineless devs that enable them are.
What are you talking about? I take hour long video game breaks and nap breaks in addition to lunch. I probably actually code for like 3 hours a day, but I get more done in those 3 hours after charging up than if I'd sit there staring at code for 3 hours.
I'm not sure what's with your first sentence. Everything else you said agreed with the point I was making...
People ignore that.
You guys get formal meetings?
And the free slots aren't for coding but for writing docs, creating jira tickets and code review.
I feel lucky to have avoided this so far. It's really not like this on my team. I write a fair bit of code and review a ton of code.
I find this tends to be more of a case in bigger companies where middle management becomes dominant.
i intentionally do middling-at-best work on projects that i don't like so that i'm never asked to perform them again nor join meetings about it; and i think my mostly empty calendar reflects the effectiveness of my strategy.