“Drop a grumpy”
– Johnny Depp testifying against Amber Heard
this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2024
152 points (92.7% liked)
Ask Lemmy
26968 readers
963 users here now
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
Not pooping, but whenever i have gas, I say I ate a kitten. Not many people get it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sjRO6BQFMw
For when I have to take a piss I like to say "I'll have to take a trip to the drinks return"
Works a bit better in German because of our bottle return system
I tell my wife I have to go blast a dookie.
It’s a Simpson reference.
load more comments
(1 replies)
"Gotta sit on my thinking chair for a bit" or "lemme go listen to my own shit for a while"
Usually in dutch tho, "ff op de denkstoel zitten" or "even naar m'n eigen gezijk luisteren"
Hard insider, "Doing an Olli". We had a coworker named Oliver and when ever we were at a customer on site he not only showed up late but always went straight for the toilets making us wait even longer.
Two of my favourites are:
- I'm touching cloth.
- Dropping the kids off at the pool.
Gotta run, I'm groundhogging!
Sorry im late for the meeting folks. I just took a massive bio break.
Where do you people take your excrement?
I tend to leave mine. Sometimes I even flush them..
My IBS is flaring up. Be back in 30.
Time to lighten my load.
Instant weight loss plan.
I have to see a man about a horse.
I have to turn a bolus
I tell my dog "dookies get cookies" when she's taking too long to find the PERFECT spot to drop a giant soft serve ice cream cone.
I gotta go hang a mud snake.
I'm gonna knit a brown sweater. If you guess what I'm gonna do, I'll let you have half of it.
Time for the most productive part of my day
Gotta go ponder the mysteries of the universe.
Gotta go release my fear.
Gotta go pop a squat.
Gotta go stop a penalty kick.
Toodle-oo (to the loo) as you leave the room. That's what I say to my cats at least.
Do pardon my absence, for it seems my coffee has stimulated gastrin production, triggering peristalsis and thus motility of a log flume near my nethers.
I'm off to strain the spuds.
"I gotta see a man about a horse" Cowboy Curtis used this one on Pee Wee's Playhouse
I have to back one out
Though it's in Spanish, a good translation would be: The mole is poking out.
load more comments
(3 replies)