this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2024
317 points (95.2% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] sazey@lemmy.world 233 points 1 month ago

Anon chose to outdo the fat friend and cock block himself.

[–] LouNeko@lemmy.world 212 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Drunk off his ass.

Need a ride home?

Wtf?

[–] MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 116 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's ok, this is just what Anon imagined he'd say and do from across the bar while he stared at them and finished his drinks alone.

[–] Klear@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago

It's what he imagined he'd imagine if he ever went to a bar.

[–] ArbiterXero@lemmy.world 52 points 1 month ago

Perhaps “willing to pay for taxi”?

Or “my DD friend is getting me and he owes me a favour?”

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 21 points 1 month ago

He was the train conductor.

[–] dev_null@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 month ago

Maybe accompany her so she doesn't have to take the bus alone.

[–] Damage@slrpnk.net 166 points 1 month ago

Dude filtered himself. Best outcome.

[–] andrewta@lemmy.world 64 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Could have been worse. Not sure how but it can always be worse

[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 118 points 1 month ago

Poor girl could have gone home with that asshole.

[–] Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works 53 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Maybe he just did the wrong animal impressions to impress her

[–] ZarkleFarkle@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 month ago

Yellow Canary mining

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 23 points 1 month ago

Ok, but I can relate to smiling irl when I see an internet meme in the memetics of the wild

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

hopefully the fat friend got over the friendzone