this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2023
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Hello you awesome people,

Friends are having a boy and everyone they know wants to push a name on the child. So I decided to be the best friend they could have and to offer only bad, ugly or horrendous names to the lucky parents so they could have a laugh. I already send them some names and dictators, Smeagol, Steve and Juan-Esteban.

So please, people or Lemmy, give me the worst names you could give a child, so that I can help them as a good friend!

Ps: don't worry, I've already planned some meals to drop off when the gremlin will be there to feed the parents. And some take-out vouchers so they won't get food poisoning

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[–] yenahmik@lemmy.world 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I once knew someone who refused to tell anyone the name they chose before the baby was born (absolutely valid choice, IMO). The grandpa-to-be chose to exclusively refer to the fetus as Beelzebub.

[–] Freeman@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

That is normal around where I live, because you never know if it will be ~~alice~~ alive after birth. So I mostly see the name in the birth-card my friends usually send

[–] MaggiWuerze@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Where are you from? Chernobyl?

[–] Freeman@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] MaggiWuerze@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

because you never know if it will be ~~alice~~ alive after birth.

I know the risk exists here as well, but "you never know" sounds like something someone from rural Africa would say, not Switzerland.

[–] Freeman@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Maybe its an old tradition. But I was shocked by how deadly being pregnant and giving birth (to the mother and the child even moreso) is, still to this day. I thought we solved childbirth or something.

[–] MaggiWuerze@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago

Yeah, the female physique hasn't really adapted to our enormous head size. We solved child mortality more or less, but pregnancy and birth is still quite dangerous.

[–] sobanto@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago
[–] 30p87@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] FlyForABeeGuy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

As a guy that has 5 first names, I take offense!

[–] 30p87@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Last time I met someone with 5 names we were in a psychiatry.

^Just\ a\ note^

[–] FlyForABeeGuy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Maybe my mom tried to tell everyone about my personality just by giving them my names?

[–] 30p87@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It probably reflects her mental state too, depending on what the names are.

[–] FlyForABeeGuy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

She put a little Pedro in there. 30 years later and I still don't know why

[–] 30p87@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago

At least the depressed guys names had meaning oh ~~god~~ darwin

[–] Asudox@lemmy.world 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Jugemu Jugemu Go-Kō-no-Surikire Kaijari-suigyo no Suigyō-matsu Unrai-matsu Fūrai-matsu Kū-Neru Tokoro ni Sumu Tokoro Yaburakōji no Burakōji Paipo Paipo Paipo no Shūringan Shūringan no Gūrindai Gūrindai no Ponpokopii no Ponpokonaa no Chōkyūmei no Chōsuke

[–] nx2@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What?!? What a coincidence! My name is also Jugemu Jugemu Go-Kō-no-Surikire Kaijari-suigyo no Suigyō-matsu Unrai-matsu Fūrai-matsu Kū-Neru Tokoro ni Sumu Tokoro Yaburakōji no Burakōji Paipo Paipo Paipo no Shūringan Shūringan no Gūrindai Gūrindai no Ponpokopii no Ponpokonaa no Chōkyūmei no Chōsuke!

[–] shrippen@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Oh, hello! Can Jugemu Jugemu Go-Kō-no-Surikire Kaijari-suigyo no Suigyō-matsu Unrai-matsu Fūrai-matsu Kū-Neru Tokoro ni Sumu Tokoro Yaburakōji no Burakōji Paipo Paipo Paipo no Shūringan Shūringan no Gūrindai Gūrindai no Ponpokopii no Ponpokonaa no Chōkyūmei no Chōsuke come out to play?

[–] nx2@feddit.de 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Yes, Jugemu Jugemu Go-Kō-no-Surikire Kaijari-suigyo no Suigyō-matsu Unrai-matsu Fūrai-matsu Kū-Neru Tokoro ni Sumu Tokoro Yaburakōji no Burakōji Paipo Paipo Paipo no Shūringan Shūringan no Gūrindai Gūrindai no Ponpokopii no Ponpokonaa no Chōkyūmei no Chōsuke! I've come to play!

[–] shrippen@feddit.de 1 points 10 months ago

Geez, your name is so long. Now he's gone.