this post was submitted on 23 Jul 2024
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Asklemmy
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Im a locksmith.
Customer: Do you make duplicates? Me: Yes C: How much? M: Depends on the type of key C: The normal one M: -_-
Or, after opening a customers door who was locked out:
C: Why so expensive tho? It only took you five minutes! M: -_- (Thats exactly why you dumb fuck, and I told you the price beforehand)
I also hate when people tries to haggle the price because I know for a fact that Im the cheapest locksmith in the area.
Meanwhile youβve spent 30-60 minutes driving for their problem. I feel ya.
Those are the worst! Thankfully my drive times arent usually that long.
Tell me you don't live in Seattle without telling me you don't live in Seattle.
Who are you and how did you get in here?
Im a locksmith and... Im a locksmith.
never gets old.
I'd be tempted to lock them back out and leave.
Yeah, I have thought about it. Perhaps some day when I get really tired of that BS I will do it but for now, I need the monies.
Lock the door, drill the core. Charge them for a new core + re keying + installation and wear on the drillbit. Use 30 minutes and make sure the price is 3x of your regular unlock fee. Now they are 6x on your time for only 3x the price. Super bargain
That reminds me of the joke where a factory has a big machine break down. They call in a specialist to fix it.
The specialist looks at the machine for a moment, hits it with a small hammer and it starts working instantly.
But on being told that the repair cost is $500, the factory owner is outraged and asks how that can possibly be justified for less than a minute's work.
"Well, it's $5 for use of the hammer, $495 for knowing exactly where to hit the machine."
Same thing with working in IT
"You just sit and hit buttons all day"
Yeah, but it's knowing which buttons to press
Tbf I'd be kinda pissed (at the situation not you) if I called a locksmith and they just whipped out a Carolina roller and got in in .3s lol.
"Goddammit where can I get one of those?!"
(Internet of course. I already have a long and a portable.)
Yep, hooks, shims, combs, etc. I love them, customers hate them. Get a better door/lock is what I tell them, but your next lock out might be more expensive.
Oh for sure. I meet in the middle, my deadbolt is alright, and it's always locked unless I'm actively using the door, if I walk out without my keys I'll get locked out because of the knob, but I can just shrum my way right past the knob lock and retrieve my keys so I can lock the bolt on the way out, and be good to go!
The only thing I need a locksmith for is I have a safe that needs to be re-locked with a dial instead of digital.