this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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*Edit: JFC, I've been physically ill at the thought that I was just trying to justify choosing something that was just shitty behavior. I haven't even been all that comfortable talking to my therapist about it as much as I've needed to. And reading every single response (so far)..... well i'm in literal tears over the relief I feel not being alone in thought. Thank you. *

To clarify, they want me to use the money to buy a duplex / other property for me take care of (for the entire place) and to renovate and to live in, while renting out the other unit/room/whathaveyou so that I don't have to worry about property taxes or the basic necessities of life.

(feel free to ignore this paragraph explaining my anxities and ignorance)The entire topic of inheritance and the circumstances leading to one has caused several of my worst panic attacks when it has been brought up in the past. (Bad enough to require medication assistance to regulate) And thankfully, this family member was aware and stopped bringing it up as they were in the habit of doing. Over the last 2 years I've come a long way with my issue and getting help fortunately, which has proven to be useful in this context recently. Their health recently took a scary decline, I've been able to regulate myself in the discussions that have followed, within reason.

I haven't yet been capable of asking the specifics on how much money it will be, or if there will be any trusts or whatever etc. And honestly, I don't think I'll be able to in the near future. But the way they talk about it, it sounds as though it will be enough to at (at least almost) pay for a small duplex type of situation.

I'm currently unhoused, and have been for over a year, so there is no love of capitalism in me, much less any desire to "be a landlord". I feel very ethically convicted against becoming what I think of when I think of Landlords, even one of those local 2-3 property owning ones.

Unfortunately I feel that clashing with the rest of values surrounding honoring the wishes of what is currently my last surviving relative (who I still remain in contact with and love dearly). Not to mention whatever might be a part of any legal stuff pertaining to her will. (which I know hardly anything about and still makes me panicked just typing about)

My main question:

Is it ethical to own a property that I live in, provide the standard maintenance for, and work on renovating.... and also rent out part of it?

I value my ethics, and part of that has always been assessing the nuances thoughtfully. When I think about the specifics of this, I find difficulty in framing that situation as the role of a landlord. Landlord being defined, at least the way I think about what a landlord is / the way other people use it.

My followup question:

Is anyone who is paid money that is for sure another person's "rent money" considered a landlord, regardless of it being the only property they own? Even if they also live there?

*Edit 2: for only those in such a position, I have no shame sharing this link since the 1st time was many months ago https://gofund.me/9bd76285 *

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[–] Hikermick@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Why do you GAF what anybody here says? Sounds like you've been given a great opportunity. If it improves your life go for it. Let your conscience be your guide

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

We all gotta examine our choices from time to time an make sure we are ok with what we considered when made them.

Otherwise we're likely to end up close minded and arrogant / cocksure and self-righteous.

[–] Hikermick@lemmy.world 0 points 2 weeks ago

Of course, that's why I said follow your conscience. Social media particularly Lemmy is a terrible place to ask questions like this though. You may as well as if it's okay to become a cop LOL. The truth is the world does need landlords and cops. When they get demonized good people are less likely to become them and narcissists will take their place.

I was a landlord and had no problem saying so here. No matter what I said, people cut me down. My renters called me the best landlord, one called me the coolest landlord. Their opinions are the ones I care about. I charged $300 less than the house next door. None of this mattered to folks on Lemmy. I don't take it personal. People talk differently anonymously online than they do in person. That's their shortcoming not mine.

Good luck with whatever decision you make. I hope you have someone to mentor you in real life. I had several plus friends who are carpenters, plumbers, electricians and HVAC techs. They were invaluable