this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2024
289 points (94.5% liked)

You Should Know

32556 readers
5 users here now

YSK - for all the things that can make your life easier!

The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules (interactive)


Rule 1- All posts must begin with YSK.

All posts must begin with YSK. If you're a Mastodon user, then include YSK after @youshouldknow. This is a community to share tips and tricks that will help you improve your life.



Rule 2- Your post body text must include the reason "Why" YSK:

**In your post's text body, you must include the reason "Why" YSK: It’s helpful for readability, and informs readers about the importance of the content. **



Rule 3- Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here.

Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here. Breaking this rule will not get you or your post removed, but it will put you at risk, and possibly in danger.



Rule 4- No self promotion or upvote-farming of any kind.

That's it.



Rule 5- No baiting or sealioning or promoting an agenda.

Posts and comments which, instead of being of an innocuous nature, are specifically intended (based on reports and in the opinion of our crack moderation team) to bait users into ideological wars on charged political topics will be removed and the authors warned - or banned - depending on severity.



Rule 6- Regarding non-YSK posts.

Provided it is about the community itself, you may post non-YSK posts using the [META] tag on your post title.



Rule 7- You can't harass or disturb other members.

If you harass or discriminate against any individual member, you will be removed.

If you are a member, sympathizer or a resemblant of a movement that is known to largely hate, mock, discriminate against, and/or want to take lives of a group of people and you were provably vocal about your hate, then you will be banned on sight.

For further explanation, clarification and feedback about this rule, you may follow this link.



Rule 8- All comments should try to stay relevant to their parent content.



Rule 9- Reposts from other platforms are not allowed.

Let everyone have their own content.



Rule 10- The majority of bots aren't allowed to participate here.

Unless included in our Whitelist for Bots, your bot will not be allowed to participate in this community. To have your bot whitelisted, please contact the moderators for a short review.



Partnered Communities:

You can view our partnered communities list by following this link. To partner with our community and be included, you are free to message the moderators or comment on a pinned post.

Community Moderation

For inquiry on becoming a moderator of this community, you may comment on the pinned post of the time, or simply shoot a message to the current moderators.

Credits

Our icon(masterpiece) was made by @clen15!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Why YSK: some very dangerous people and organizations use love bombing as a strategy to manipulate and recruit people. Love bombing is often an early warning sign for a traumatizing relationship, so it's helpful to be able to spot the signs.

What it Is

Essentially, it's when someone showers you with love and attention. It often includes a lot of reassurance that you belong with someone or in a group. It can include gifts, flattery, praise, and it usually includes a lot of excitement about your future together or with a group.

The catch is that the love bomb goes away, and you become devalued after the love bomb. This is usually followed by a "discard phase", where if you try to confront the behavior, you are rejected and made to feel at fault. After you've become upset by this, they will often start the cycle again to keep your loyalty.

There are some really key warning signs to look out for:

  1. They give you gifts, especially random gifts
  2. They want all of your attention
  3. They're desperate for commitment from you
  4. You feel pressure to not tell them no
  5. They constantly talk about how much they love you, how special you are, etc.
  6. You feel flattered but uneasy around them
  7. They want to know a lot about you very quickly
  8. They emphasize how much better everything is when you are with them

Where can I spot it?

Love bombing is very common in abusive and manipulative relationships. It's also often noticeable in cult recruiting, when members are trained to shower you with love and affection.

What can I do about it?

It can be good to seek help from a mental health professional if you're already hurt from the effects of love bombing. If you're in crisis, consider contacting a local crisis or emergency line.

If you notice signs of love bombing, there are some strategies that often work to keep people safe:

  • set firm boundaries early
  • stay grounded (i.e., take their praise with a grain of salt)
  • ask, "what might they want from this interaction?"
  • end a relationship if it's not working
  • give as little information out as possible at the start of a relationship
  • ask an objective 3rd party how they feel about your relationship with this person or group

More resources

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/love-bombing https://www.choosingtherapy.com/love-bombing/

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Is this the DENNIS system?

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 1 month ago

Separate completely.