insomniacalmond

My BF Jay (15M) and I (15F) have been dating for about a year now. Now, we are obviously young, so I’ll probably need different advice than an adult woman.

Anyway, Jay hardly ever says he loves me (though he’s been starting to now, thankfully), reads my texts and never responds, and had another girl’s name in his bio.

One section said “Status: Taken I love my gfs ❤️ Currently dating: Almond [me], Mae [the other girl]”

Of course, I asked him who Mae was, and he said that she’s a girl he’s been into for a while and who he has been seeing. However, he never told me about Mae, and I’m assuming he never tells Mae about me.

At first, I thought he was just a private guy when he never posted about me and never said he had a GF. When he talked about people he was grateful for and people he made stuff for, he never included me.

I want to trust him, but especially with the leaving me on read and being with Mae (who he apparently doesn’t talk to anymore), I need advice on what to do.

:)

I've noticed that when I wake up, the alter that usually cofronts is still asleep. This normally would be fine with me, except for the fact that I often have to get up early, and our body can't function well unless every alter in front is active.

Has this ever happened to you? Do I just go to the headspace and shake him awake somehow?

Some people, of course, answer questions respectfully, which I’m grateful about. However, there are many people who just respond with stuff like “What a stupid question. I hope you die you fat bitch. Of course it’s people like you who ask stupid questions like this. You don’t know anything, shut up and die.”

If you ask anything about politics, for example, someone will say something like “I hope you die, liberal. You don’t know anything about politics, stop assuming shit you fat bitch. Liberals are stupid and so are you.”

Answers like these aren’t at ALL relevant to the question, a lot of them who say not to assume things are ironically assuming things about the person who asked. I’ve also noticed that a lot of people with such responses often have the most responses and show up as people to ask on that topic, as well as a few of them having on their bio “I’m so smart”. Sure, but your responses do not make you sound that way.

Don’t get me wrong, not everyone is like this, and I will get a respectful response or two, but 80% of the answers are stuff like this. I’ve seen quite a few responses from these assholes saying that women are the Devil’s spawn and whatnot, so I’m gonna assume these are trolls, but when they make up so much of the responses, it’s annoying as hell.

And no, people on Quora, I’m not just upset with people who disagree with me. The problem isn’t that they disagree, it’s that they’re being assholes.

If I mention my friend's boyfriend once, I'm obsessed with her dating life.

If I send a "gotta go" text to someone, which takes a few seconds, I'm suddenly wasting time and always on my phone.

If I calmly tell my grandma that her statement is not true, she says I'm easily offended and being a snowflake.

If I say the name of a TV show, they think I'm unhealthily obsessed with it.

I'm yelled at if I'm not the ideal, quiet girl. Is this normal? How can I let them get to know me like they want to do?

Oh, did I say, "my girlfriend Kate", family? Yeah, Kate's my friend and she's a girl!

"Girlfriend of ten months"? We've been friends for ten months, guys!

You see how we hug a lot, hold hands, sometimes kiss? Kate is a very dear friend to me. We're closer than anyone else, and we show that by doing all that!

Oh, you saw me flirt with her? Friends do that jokingly! I wanna move in with her due to how expensive it'd be if we each got our own place! We'll be ROOMMATES.... who sometimes make out.

We just practice kissing! Ya think guys will date us if we're bad kissers?

My friend Abby texted the group chat one day. She said that our friend Ella's mom texted Abby and told her that Ella passed out and still hasn’t woken up.

Of course, for hours, we were worried sick about her. Abby told us she hasn’t received any more news about Ella. I vented to my family about it, and they said they were sorry that happened to Ella and I’d just have to wait and see if she gets better.

Ella also has a boyfriend, Michael. Michael and I eventually found out from Ella that it was a prank, and she had just turned her phone off. I was worried about her, and Michael was pissed to find out that she did that.

Ella thought it wouldn’t get a reaction, so she did that because she was bored and didn’t know what to do.

I'm not sure where to put this. Just... it worried me so badly, since Ella's a friend and I care about her. Why would someone even do this?

This girl, Abby texted the group chat to tell us something bad happened to our friend Ella, that her mom sent a message saying she collapsed and fainted.

It had been several hours, and Abby said Ella hasn't woken up yet, according to her mother.

I was worried, vented to my family about it, and tried calling her number. It appeared her phone had been turned off.

Later, Ella told me and her BF Michael that it was a prank and that her phone was off because she was on a plane. She was bored and thought no one would care if she was in an actual coma.

I was relieved and Michael was rightfully pissed.

I'm sorry to gush, but he's so quiet and peaceful that I want to hug him. It's honestly so relaxing to see him asleep, although sometimes I accidentally get pushed behind which leads to the body getting sleepy.

Every time I talk to my family about something, and my grandma happens to be in the room (almost always), I could bring up something such as school friends (since my family will ask if anything exciting happened), and I’ll bring up something ONCE like: “I’m so happy for my friend Ella. She’s liked this dude, Michael, for a long time, and now they’re finally together!”

Suddenly, my grandma will say “You know, it’s so WEIRD that you’re obsessed with Ella’s dating life? Why are you being so WEIRD?”

I’ll calmly respond with, “I’m just happy for her. I’m talking about things that happened at school.”

She’ll tell me that I get offended too easily and that I’m oppressing her, that she can’t say ANYTHING without me getting offended.

When I told my family that I just got diagnosed with a disorder and was trying to process it, she told me I was obsessed with “being mentally ill and making it my whole personality”, when I only mentioned being tested for it a few times.

She frequently makes comments when I say anything about a topic, and then when I calmly tell her that her comment isn’t true, she thinks that I’m upset with her and stuff.

How do I deal with the comments? I live with her, BTW.

My friend Ana (15F) is generally a nice person, but she can be a little weird with some things, specifically Gym. Ana does not like taking accountability for her own mistakes, nor does she seem to believe/accept that she can be wrong sometimes.

Ana constantly blames others (like me) for things like her serving the volleyball behind herself instead of over the net, for example.

When I pass to someone and they end up missing in basketball, she blames me for passing to them and not her.

If I end up winning a point, she sarcastically slow claps and says “Wow. You finally did something useful for once.”

She gets mad at me for setting or spiking a volleyball that’s too high for me to bump as well, saying she’s better than everyone, that everyone is useless, and that I was actually supposed to bump it down low.

She makes sure to remind people how terrible they are and how she’s better than them, too. Ana has anger issues (she says it’s because of her parents) and while she acts like nothing happened/apologizes in the next period, she does the same things again and again since around 12 years old. I like Ana as a friend but I hate when she yells at me and others for everything.

How’s everyone doing today? :)