askmenover30

1. that people are perfect. We all mess up. Forgive and more importantly move on.
2. that your partner will always be the same. People change over time, and so will you.
3. that your love will always be the same. It changes over time

Why are you asking me? I've been married for 17 years, clearly I'm doing things right. If I was in the business of making mistakes, I wouldn't have been married this long. All kidding aside, I often see people have a lack of interest in the other person. It should be genuine interest in the other person's hobbies and interests. Like, my wife is really into dog training, I'm not, but still we talk about it and we do it together sometimes, just because I want to share in what she is doing and support her in it.

Married 26 years here. The biggest mistake I see my single friends make is getting in relationships with the wrong women. Beauty probably should not be a top five criteria. I am not saying you need to date hags, but for a successful relationship personality, interests, and compatibility matters much more.

Find someone that values and prioritizes the same things you do. Someone that you can communicate with and trust.

Beauty is a depreciating asset. If the only reason you are with someone is because she is hot or good in bed, then you are in for a bad time in the long run.

Taking their partner for granted and letting communication get lazy. Yes you’re friends and partners, but it can be easy to forget the emotionality and connection in the routine bustle of life.

Become a feminist. It doesn’t mean you kowtow to every whim and women are always right and better than you. It means you take your fair share of running the household and the relationship.

Read this; https://amp.theguardian.com/world/2017/may/26/gender-wars-household-chores-comic

Learn about the Second Shift and Mental Load. Together, make a job board of things that need to be done around the house and divvy up work.

If one partner knows how to do a housekeeping task, they other should know too.

My wife doesn’t brag about me to her friends because when her friends brag about their husbands it’s insanely basic shit. For example one had Covid and was bragging about how her husband learned how to make eggs for the kids so she could get a little extra sleep in the morning. Eggs! Look, if you don’t know how to cook eggs, you don’t know how to cook. It’s a life skill, not a wife skill. Not saying you need to be the family cook, break down household chores however works best for you, but be prepared to take over any and all chores from your spouse at the drop of a hat. You never know when sickness might happen, or worse. What would you do if you suddenly became a single parent if only for a week? Know how to do it all now so you can take it on when you need to.