this post was submitted on 10 Jul 2024
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Programmer Humor

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Always try sudo (programming.dev)
submitted 2 months ago by JPDev@programming.dev to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev
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[–] dactylotheca@suppo.fi 197 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Doctor of Computer Science

stringly-typed "100%"

yeah that tracks.

[–] vala@lemmy.world 127 points 2 months ago (8 children)

Calls a static method on the OldMan class instead of the instance of oldMan that is actually dying.

[–] emuspawn@orbiting.observer 63 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

Tonight's story: Every man older than OldMan.getMinimumAge() has been in perfect *unchanging* health for the last few months‽ To find out why, stay tuned! Our experts chime in to help you understand....

[–] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

If only I'd been born %YEARS% later :'-(

[–] nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 2 months ago

But then they really have no idea and try to convince you it’s from some stupid diet trick fed to them by a sponsor.

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[–] Emotet@slrpnk.net 27 points 2 months ago (1 children)

str(float("100.0")) + "%"

[–] dactylotheca@suppo.fi 34 points 2 months ago (1 children)

[–] WanakaTree@lemm.ee 9 points 2 months ago

Haha I'm saving this image

[–] Fades@lemmy.world 185 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (25 children)

WHY IS THE HEALTH INPUT PARAMETER A GODDAMN STRING?????????????

Why are you passing ‘%’ inside said goddamn string?!?! Not to mention the static reference instead of the actual instance.

Shame on you

[–] jdaxe@infosec.pub 68 points 2 months ago

Also putting sudo in front of what looks like Java code not shell.

[–] cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone 36 points 2 months ago (1 children)

OldMan.setHealth("Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--")

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[–] blind3rdeye@lemm.ee 28 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I guess its just a reminder that getting a PhD is often more about dedication than it is about practical knowledge.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago

Because the meme wasn't made by someone with a doctorate in CS or even a bachelor's.

[–] devfuuu@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Smells like JavaScript.

[–] lud@lemm.ee 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's not his fault the world is made this way.

He just has to follow it or else that man dies.

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[–] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (2 children)

They use a look-up table with every value from 0% to 100%

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[–] FatTony@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Honestly, if someone were to try to safe my life. And I find out he uses a string as a parameter to do so. Just let me die right there.

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[–] Technus@lemmy.zip 100 points 2 months ago (3 children) 
sudo rm /heart/arteries/**/clot
[–] AmbiguousProps@lemmy.today 90 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Very important to not hit enter before clot.

[–] Technus@lemmy.zip 37 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That's why you have backups.

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[–] hperrin@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Isn’t it /dev/heart?

[–] Technus@lemmy.zip 21 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I feel like if your body follows the Unix filesystem structure, you have a real problem.

[–] BleatingZombie@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Please forgive my ignorance. What does ** do?

[–] gaylord_fartmaster@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Acts as a wildcard for any directories that exist between arteries and clot.

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[–] Technus@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

It's a glob pattern (edit: tried to find a source that actually showed ** in use).

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[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 79 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You are not in the sudoers file. This incident will be reported.

[–] Mercury@lemmy.world 42 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Goddamn, the joke gets worse the more I inspect each panel.

[–] johannesvanderwhales@lemmy.world 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

XKCD 149 but worse.

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Link for the lazy.

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[–] Linkerbaan@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The font changes like 3 times 👌

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[–] oo1@lemmings.world 38 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Can he also fix alzheimer's by hunting down memory leaks.

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[–] sundray@lemmus.org 29 points 2 months ago (1 children)

"Wait! We need to get the user story before we start working on a solution!"

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[–] PieMePlenty@lemmy.world 26 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Did he just give every old man perfect health?!

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[–] apocalypticat@lemmy.world 20 points 2 months ago (1 children)

sudo apt-get AED

[–] Classy@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 months ago

sudo pacman -S new-heart

[–] Andrzej@lemmy.myserv.one 18 points 2 months ago

Top-tier endangerment bait lmao

[–] hperrin@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

Bash-Java

[–] PhlubbaDubba@lemm.ee 14 points 2 months ago (3 children)

See that's the issue, he should have tried stopping the cardiac arrest process instead of just resetting the man to the beginning of it

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[–] guemax@lemmy.today 12 points 2 months ago

HeLlOoOoO, wHaT nOw? It'S a Do Or DiE sItUaTiOn, HuRrY!

[–] moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 2 months ago

I wish there was a last panel of the old guy getting revived, I think it would be funny

[–] nyan@lemmy.cafe 9 points 2 months ago

bash: sudo: command not found

After all, we don't know that he has it installed, especially if he's running a really old distro.

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