this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2024
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I'll probably stick to asking for oat milk instead of "porridge water" or whatever the new mandated name will be. To be honest I do think calling it "milk" lets them inflate the price when it is essentially porridge water.

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[–] Rogue@feddit.uk 77 points 3 weeks ago

Dairy UK had argued that it was unlawful to use “milk” in a trademark relating to “products that are not mammary secretions”.

I think consumers need to argue that all milk should be accurately labelled as "mammary secretions"

[–] Churbleyimyam@lemm.ee 70 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Feeling a bit insecure are you, dairy industry?

[–] OrlandoDoom@feddit.uk 34 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

They see younger generations using less milk and this is their tantrum.

Meat industry does this too, but aren't as successful most of the time.

[–] GreatAlbatross@feddit.uk 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

They see younger generations moving away from dairy, and claim it's because non-dairy stole the words.

When in my case at least, it only took a week milk-free to realise that having mild discomfort in your stomach all the time isn't normal.
And that drinking MOMA instead left me feeling lighter and happier.

I switched to oat milk simply because it lasts longer in the fridge. Cow's milk is not designed for any kind of shelf life at all.

[–] Davel23@fedia.io 40 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Milk of Magnesia has been getting away with it for decades.

[–] MouldyCat@feddit.uk 25 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

And coconut milk. We now have to call that "non-mammary coconut secretion"?

[–] DigitalDruid@lemmy.sdf.org 10 points 3 weeks ago

Nut secretions

[–] Tehdastehdas@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Hand cream. Shea butter.

[–] gerbler@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Milk of the poppy is ancient as fuck no?

[–] steeznson@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I thought George RR Martin invented the phrase "milk of the poppy" to describe apine/opium in his ASOIAF series. Never crossed my mind that he might have lifted it from a history textbook.

[–] gerbler@lemmy.world 6 points 3 weeks ago

I mean you might be right. However there exists a Ukrainian Christmas dessert called poppy milk that's just poppy seeds and water.

So I'm gonna give myself this one on a technicality haha

[–] houseofleft@slrpnk.net 36 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

I find this whole "it's not milk if it's not dairy" argument really hard to take in good faith.

I'm not an expert at all, but when I've heard people talk about these kind of decisions, it sounds like it's normally meant to come down to consumer benefits.

Who's gaining here (aside from dairy lobbies)? I don't think there's any reasonable argument that UK citizens are confused by the term "oat milk", and buying it because they were tricked into thinking it was a dairy product.

[–] disgrunty@lemmy.world 24 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

I know a person who thought that the "plant milks" are flavours of regular milk until it was explained to them. Like chocolate milk.

All people are at least a little stupid. We're all stupid in our own way. Something that seems obvious to you and I may seem mind-boggling to someone else.

[–] steeznson@lemmy.world 6 points 3 weeks ago

Would have been hilarious if big dairy brought them into the trial as an "expert witness".

"Yes, that's right ladies and gentlemen, I am a real life strawman."

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 3 weeks ago

Tbf especially with "almond milk" I could 100% see that. Honestly it's more logical than "they squeeze all the juice out of the almonds" (I have no idea the process for making almond milk lmao ykwim), someone seeing it and saying "Almonds huh? Crazy, what flavor will they think of next? I'd have chosen hazelnut" is really not that big of a jump.

Honestly I'm more surprised I didn't think that, but iirc I was informed about it through a vegan friend before I even saw it in the store.

[–] RvTV95XBeo@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Yeah there are idiots, but what's the harm? They may be shocked to find there's 0 dairy, but how does that impact them? The nutrition info is on the label, as is the ingredients.

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[–] flamingos@feddit.uk 29 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

In 2019, Oatly applied to trademark the phrase “Post Milk Generation” but this was rejected by the Intellectual Property Office (IPO) in January last year after ruling that its use of the term “milk” was “deceptive”.

But this trademark is clearly them establishing themselves as not-milk and plenty of vegan products term themselves like this ("No Steak Pie") without issue, it's only dairy products that this ridiculous standard applied to them. Guess I'll just continue to enjoy the two bottles of oat 'drink' I have in my fridge.

To be honest I do think calling it “milk” lets them inflate the price when it is essentially porridge water.

Most good oat milks will have stabilisers and vitamins (B12 especially) added to them vs if you just made some at home.

[–] Emperor@feddit.uk 22 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

But this trademark is clearly them establishing themselves as not-milk and plenty of vegan products term themselves like this (“No Steak Pie”) without issue, it’s only dairy products that this ridiculous standard applied to them.

I Can't Believe It's Not Butter seem to have no bother. Perhaps it's just Big Milk at work.

[–] flamingos@feddit.uk 10 points 3 weeks ago

I'd completely forgot about them tbh. You also see it a lot with cheese alternatives, even though they broadly fucking suck so I don't know why the cheese industry even bothers.

[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Now I want to make an oil-based spread and call it "The Product In This Container Is Absolutely Not Butter" and see how it sells.

[–] AtariDump@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

Sound like the Aldi brand.

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[–] OrlandoDoom@feddit.uk 22 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

RIP coconut milk.

Funny that before oats and soy started gaining in popularity they had no problems with coconut milk.

[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 7 points 3 weeks ago

And milk of magnesia!

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[–] Jimmyeatsausage@lemmy.world 15 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

Easy enough, go with "oat mealk"

[–] Elkenders@feddit.uk 5 points 3 weeks ago

Gosh that's good

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[–] Varyk@sh.itjust.works 15 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

some places called nut-based milk "mylk" to avoid this legal complication.

they could probably start doing that.

[–] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io 10 points 3 weeks ago

It’s not MILK (milk), it’s MlLK™ (mllk)!

[–] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Malk, now with vitamin R!

Kidding aside, dairy companies are embarrassing themselves. Everyone I've ever met just calls it oat/soy/almond/whatever milk anyway, regardless what's written on the package, even if they don't drink it.

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[–] rjek@feddit.uk 14 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

This is karma for saying it works in tea.

[–] GreatAlbatross@feddit.uk 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

The barista grade stuff works pretty well in builders tea, honestly.
You just have to get in the habit of shaking the carton.

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[–] MrPoletki@feddit.uk 4 points 3 weeks ago

oaty tea eh? sounds a bit over the top to me.

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That ship has sailed, Milk boys. Consumers call it oat milk and that’s not changing.

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 13 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

This is why I think the soy milk brand Silk is a brilliant product name.

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[–] shoulderoforion@fedia.io 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

also, unrelated, there is no such thing as boneless wings, no matter what the ohio supreme court says

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[–] GoodShowSir@feddit.uk 9 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

I love me some porridge water. Especially a porridge water latte.

You know what, I have zero problem calling it that, own it oatly! :D

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[–] FourPacketsOfPeanuts@lemmy.world 7 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

I don't like oat milk but it's more milk-like than skimmed UHT (bleurgh..). But I guess the line had to get drawn somewhere..

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I love porridge water.

[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 7 points 3 weeks ago

And what about the word “milking”? Is it legal to use when you are not talking about mammaries?

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 7 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

“thin gruel” just doesn’t have the right ring to it

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 5 points 3 weeks ago

But it gives you an excuse to say “please, sir, may I have some more”.

[–] fakeman_pretendname@feddit.uk 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

It just needs a bit of snazzy marketing.

Just call it Ultragruel or Oatfuel and write "PROTEIN" on it in big letters.

[–] fakeman_pretendname@feddit.uk 3 points 3 weeks ago

Actually, now I think about it, that only covers one section of the market.

You should also release exactly the same product with with different packaging a few times:

  • One with an off-brand Mr T character mascot, called "I Pity The Gruel".

  • One called "Bilk : Better than Milk".

That's a few shelves of supermarkets covered with selling the same thing. I'm sure you can cover some more with a few like "Barista Supreme: Oat-based Cream", "Oat Water", "Oat Juice" and simply "Oat-based Drink". Maybe even "Oat Blood", for Goths and "My dad was a gruelmaker" for Keir Starmer fans.

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[–] rpin42@feddit.uk 6 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I looked into the high price of plant milks. It’s essentially because the industry is new and still investing in R&D and new factories. The dairy industry has very little innovation now, just court cases.

[–] x00z@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

Don't forget the dairy industry takes lots of health subsidies in many countries too.

[–] Bronzebeard@lemm.ee 5 points 3 weeks ago

Nothing like a nice glass of oat juice

[–] normalexit@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Taco bell calls its beef-like offering "beefy", like a "beefy 5 layer burrito".

I'd have some Oat Milky.

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