Granted. Nobody else can see the creature, which usually appears as a spider crawling out of someone's face or somewhere on your body. You have to ask the questions outloud so everyone just thinks you're insane.
The Monkey's Paw
Want to make a wish? Just ask the Monkey’s Paw! No strings attached.*
Just create a post that starts with “I wish ___”. Other users will then grant you the wish, and probably not how you intended.
^(*)^ ^Strings^ ^definitely^ ^attached.^ ^Satisfaction^ ^not^ ^guaranteed.^ ^Wish^ ^will^ ^likely^ ^backfire.^
Granted. A loud voice, only you can hear, starts to answer every question you have ever had. Questions you never really cared about. Questions you never really wanted answered. Questions you don't even remember having. All answered in maticulous details, often going so deep into historical or scientific details that new questions pop into your mind no matter how much you try to stop them. Not that it even matters. You no longer want the answers that relentlessly come, one after the other, with no context nor pause. It all becomes nonsensical noise that won't stop. The voice booms through your head, drowning out all other sounds. Preventing you from holding down a job, communicating with others, or even sleeping. All you want is a moment of silence, a chance to sleep. You wonder if there is any way to stop your slide further into insanity. But you don't have to wonder. You've already been told the answer. You know how to make it stop.
(mild shitpost answer)
Granted.
It only responds with "THERE IS AS YET INSUFFICIENT DATA FOR A MEANINGFUL ANSWER"
Scientifically, that would probably be the most accurate answer to most questions.
Granted. It's there and people can see it but every answer always ends with explaining how that will lead to the end of society.
Wish fulfilled. The creature only eats children under 5 years old, and requires daily feedings.