this post was submitted on 27 Jul 2024
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I'm an ex incel myself, but I've been seeing a few users here exhibiting the tell tale signs. "I'm not attractive enough", "I don't socialize correctly", "I'll never find a woman" - all extremely unhealthy attitudes.

Personally I burned through many friendships and ruined a lot of chances with women because I was in the incel community. The community warped my view of women so much that I made it even harder to meet women, I became my own worst enemy. I lost friends because all I could think of was how horrible it was that they had girlfriends.

I have a friend who helped me out of it. She was the one who started calling out my bad behavior for what it was, and I started on the long uphill path out of it. I'm now married and stable for well over a decade, but I still think back to those days, and it depresses me seeing other people causing this themselves and not being aware of it.

So, Lemmy, for those who have clawed out of it, what's your story?

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[–] KeepFlying@lemmy.world 41 points 1 month ago (3 children)

It seems like incels, or at least Tate-holes, treat every conversation as a challenge with the reward being sex.

Just be friends with people. Who fucking cares if you end up in a romantic relationship, allow yourself to form close intimate friendships that aren't physical.

[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Awesome! I scored 6 conversation points, I can redeem my punch card for sex now!

[–] KeepFlying@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

Oh you didn't hear about the pricing update.... Sex costs 15 now, but you can redeem 6 for a hug if you ask nicely.

Perfect way to put it - this is how I’ve felt about Tate, etc, but couldn’t describe it. This is so spot on.