Well, I finally gathered the courage to have my coming out to my mother. Overall I would rate the experience a solid 4/10. The first reaction was kinda trash (She replied with, "does that really have to be") and then later complained, that I told it to her at around 8pm, because now she will think about it and probably wont be able to sleep that easily. Some of her not so nice other reactions:
- You wont take surgeries (I replied with we'll see)
- I shouldnt have dressed you as a girl that one time in my last week of school (I told her that I have indications of me being trans before that)
- But maybe what you feel isnt what you interpret out of it
After the last thing I wanted to explain, why I am devinetively sure I am trans, but she interrupted me with "I want to take a shower (bruh) now and you can tell this when the rest [of the family] is there too, so you dont have to tell it 3 times (She kinda got a point there)"
But luckyly enough she seemed willing to accept it ("We dont really have any choice"), and agreed to tell the rest of the family (yay). She also said, that I will continue to be her child, so I guess thats a win. She was absolutely shocked, but she will get over it.
When taking into consideration, that my parents are conspiracy theorists, this is about the best possible outcome I could have hoped for. It could have been much worse, especially when taking into consideration, that there whole social circle are also conspiracy theorists, of which some are right wing and I also heard such nice statements as "The WHO wants to make us all gay" (or something like that) from one of their friends.
Your mother sounds like a huge narcissist.
Good luck girl, you got this! ππ€π
She isnt a narcissist, shes just absolutely shocked and overwhelmed.
Okay good for you then!
Myeeah, narcissist or not, she fumbled a lot of opportunities to show empathy here. It sounds like she wanted you to know what an ordeal this was for her which I think is pretty shitty. I admire your tenacity in sticking out the conversation.
Also I don't know if she does have a point about having to repeat yourself. I personally felt much more comfortable coming out to every friend and family member oneβbyβone, and must have repeated myself at least 20 times now. I felt more confident and empowered each time. It also served as good practice in owning my identity when it came time to change my name legally, and everything that came along with that.
The bottom line is that it's totally up to you how you want to come out, fast or slow, privately or publicly. You shouldn't have to be made more uncomfortable than the whole thing already is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZFQG2e87ZU