this post was submitted on 12 Jul 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[โ€“] BackOnMyBS@lemmy.autism.place 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I don't know how couples like that do it. I was in the military and went on several deployments. Whenever I would get back, it felt like I was re-learning anyone I hadn't seen throughout that time. Think of what you were doing 458 days ago on Apr 13, 2023. I was getting a psych evaluation that completely revolutionized my life. I have changed sooooo much since then. Now imagine that your partner has changed as well. How do you reconnect if y'all don't know each other any more?

When I see photos of this, I don't see a touching moment. I see a photo of two individuals that are living a hopeful delusion because their lives were ripped apart by external forces, and they didn't know to grieve. Now, they're trying to carry on from where they were, but aren't consciously aware that they can't. They are about to find out that they are strangers and undergo a rapid grieving process full of disappointment, anger, and ultimately sadness.

Follow me for more somber interpretations of scenes that are commonly seen as joyful moments ๐Ÿ‘Œ

[โ€“] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

I'm sorry to hear that and that really sucks. I didn't spend that long apart from my wife, but I did move to L.A. for 6 months back before you could do anything like video chat, texting was 10 cents a text, and even long distance was still more expensive than local calls. We did it because I got a job, but my wife had to finish graduate school. I did get to see her on a couple of trips- once her to me and once me to her, but air travel is expensive and driving three days there and back was not really a good option, so mostly it was just emails.

I'm glad we survived it and are still married and didn't have to reconnect afterward like on a long deployment, but it also helped that we had been married for 5 or 6 years before I moved and had been dating since high school. I got lucky and found the right person, but I know that we're a real rarity.