Political Weirdos

Ahh, I see you're a Trump kid. I'm afraid I can't just give you this candy as a handout; that would be some commie socialist shit. Instead, I'm going to have to ask you to walk a couple thousand miles in the sweltering heat, then swim across this river that's been strung with razor wire, then climb over this 20-foot wall, not get spotted by border patrol, thermal imaging, dogs, etc. Once you've made it through all that, I'm gonna need you to work a minimum-wage job for twenty years while you contribute to the social security fund that you're ineligible to receive, and once you pass your citizenship test, I'll let you have a piece of candy. But I'll also spit in your face. We have standards.