this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2024
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[–] EmptySlime@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 4 months ago (1 children)

So most of these bills ban pretty much all medical interventions for anyone under 18. Puberty blockers, hormone replacement therapy, surgery, the whole nine. Some go further and are trying to ban it for anyone under 26. You could theoretically still get counseling but you wouldn't be able to actually do anything.

And yeah sure, on its face that might seem reasonable. Wouldn't want impulsive teens rushing into big irreversible medical changes on a whim right? But those safeguards already exist. You can't just walk into a gender clinic as a 10 year old boy, say the magic words "I'm actually a girl," and walk out with an appointment for bottom surgery and a prescription for titty skittles. It takes long term counseling, social transition steps like trying out a new name and pronouns, wearing clothing that aligns with your gender, etc.

In reality that hypothetical 10 year old boy walking into the clinic is going to get extensive counseling. From that counseling he might try out using a different name, she/her pronouns, or dressing in more feminine clothing. She then might get prescribed puberty blockers here to make sure she has time to do all of this and be sure of herself without being forced into male puberty. A few years go by and last statistics I saw something like 2% of people at this point say, "No I think I actually am a boy," and they go through that slightly delayed puberty. But almost all progress to HRT and later surgery.

Do some people later truly regret their transitions and try to go back? Of course they do. But realistically, transition already has basically the lowest regret rate of any medical procedure out there. A higher percentage of people regret getting something like a hip or knee replacement surgery than regret transition.

Puberty already forces your body through permanent changes that can range from easy, to nearly impossible to reverse. That's why puberty blockers are so important. Imagine if as a young cis boy through some rare medical issue you start going through female puberty. But you're a boy! You know you are. You've got a penis and everything.

But now you're growing breasts. Like big enough that you can't really hide them. Big enough that they get in the way, they're heavy, and you have to wear a bra otherwise they hurt like hell. The other boys in your grade stare at you or bully you because you're a boy but you've got bigger tits than a lot of the girls in your grade. Soon everyone starts mistaking you for a girl. Guys start hitting on you even though you're a guy and you're attracted to girls. A lot of the girls aren't interested in you because they're attracted to more... Traditional looking guys. You get told that you should just accept it. After all you look just like a girl. But you're not a girl damnit. You're a boy. This wasn't supposed to happen. Now imagine they tell you they can't do anything about it until you turn 18... Or maybe 26. Sounds terrible right?

[–] BeneGesseritWitch@sh.itjust.works 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I think something a lot of people don't realize is that transitioning is not the end of the story. You still have to live in the same exact shitty world, with all the same hate, all the same bigotry, all the hostility. And if your post-op presentation doesn't pass the stringent "do you look cis enough" high standards of society? Welp, your life is now on extra hard mode. All the people you know that are already transphobic will probably still be just as transphobic after you transition, if not worse. People de-transition for a lot of reasons but I wouldn't be surprised if the main reason is the pressure to present as either their pre-transitioned selves or to present as a perfect ideal of gender that no one can clock.

[–] EmptySlime@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

My understanding is the majority of detransition occurs due to financial reasons. So basically "I can't afford my HRT anymore," or "I can't afford top surgery right now so I'll go back to presenting as a woman," or what have you. Then once the financial issue is gone a lot of those resume transition.

Full on "I thought I was trans but I'm actually not" detransition seems to be pretty rare. Almost like the current standard of care does a pretty good job at weeding out the people for whom transition isn't the best treatment option. But to the conservatives who've decided this is their new culture war front if literally a single person ever regrets their transition, that's enough to ban it for everyone.

That's such a good point, you're not free from the financial burdens post-op. I'm just a freshly cracked egg so I'm still learning. I was going off of the convos I've had about the post-op life with friends and strangers in trans forums. A lot of the discussions around de-transitioning focused on the pressure to "be the person we knew" from people in their lives and also the pressure to reach a nigh impossible ideal of gender from society in general.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I would not blame anyone for going back into the closet because they can't take the constant abuse. It's really sad that they feel the need to do that, but I do not blame them at all. This society we live in is horrible to so many people.

[–] DeLacue@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

One of the stories I heard of someone who detransitioned was that they were in collage when they decided to transition. They lived in the dorms and well word very quickly got around. A group was organised including all of their friends and classmates who would take turns standing outside their dormroom door louding praying for them to detransition. The collage staff were no help, they'd helped organise the effort in the first place. After several months of this they gave in and went back into the closet.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

That's horrible. I hope they finally got to be who they really are.