this post was submitted on 09 Aug 2024
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Well, I can't say I would want to steal someone's talent/expertise, even if it was someone vile.
That being said, I still want to play along.
Here's my reasoning for not picking some kind of asshole with a money making skillset. I'm too fucking old to deal with that shit. I don't want the stress, don't need the stress, and I am old enough that by the time I made enough to really matter, I wouldn't be able to do much but pass it on.
So, instead, I want a skill/talent that I've never had even a little drop of success picking up. That's music. I have tried keyboards, guitar, computer based things, singing, etc. I just can't manage to wrap my head around anything well enough to make music. Closest I ever got was making beats, which I was actually okay at, but not good enough to be useful.
So, next criteria is that whoever I steal from has to be old enough that I'll get more time with their gift than they statistically have left. Ideally, they would be past the point where their abilities are useful to them as a performer making a living.
So, I'd rob Clapton of his guitar playing, and/or Robert Plant's vocal ability. They're both old enough that I'm probably going to be able to use the gifts longer than they would, and are masters of their instruments. Since Clapton is also a bit of a douche, that might make someone else happy. I think I'd err on the side of singing if I'm limited by my own body, since I have arthritis in my hands. But if that was magicked away as part of the trade, I think I'd get more mileage out of guitar as I age compared to how lungs and vocal cords age, despite my pipes being in pretty good shape.
If the dead were allowed instead of the living, I'm pulling from Randy Rhodes or Cliff Burton, though I would favor bass tbh. I think I'd end up playing more jazz than metal, but I think that kind of skill set would serve me well in any genre.