ShouldIHaveFun

You'd need to have a job first

I also hated it when I had a OnePlus 8. Luckily it fell in the floor and the screen broke. My insurance repaid me the full price and with that I bought an Xperia 5 II. It is sooo much better with its small form factor, flat screen, its stereo front facing speakers, it's headphone jack and its long battery life!

Have a look at the Xperia 10 Series (for example the Xperia 10 VI), they have all those features for what I find is a reasonable price.

Sony Xperia still have front facing speakers.

I really like that Sony didn't abandoned good features just to follow the hype. Some of those features are a headphone jack, an SD card and a small screen (big screens also available in the 1 series).

How do you know the "average person" doesn't do childish things when out in the wood by themselves?

Looks to me like a real hat you could see at a German music festival... if it were built out of empty beer cans and duct tape of course.

I'm curious, do people do this kind of stupid things (though funny, I must admit) at festivals all around the world?

There are some reactor designs that run on waste of standard reactors. It would solve two of your points for at least some decades.

Beware the short length cycle, you may soon need to wear those very short shorts like in the 80s

Yeaaah maybe I missed some subtlety of the adjective, sorry.

Hopefully I can catch some of this cheese in my head with my tongue.

Switzerland is geographically in Europe but we are not part of the European Union. We don't want to share our cheese.

Looks like half the calories of a swiss fondue. We are not really European though.