AuroraGlamour

For some background, one of my other friends, I’ll call her Penny (19F) was dealing with her dad with NPD. I looked for some advice on a subreddit called r/raisedbynarcissists. That’s when I believe what happened is that I asked something about narcissistic parents, and Jaiden (24F) shared her story in the comments. I felt really bad for her and decided to help her out and talk to her.

She then asked me if we could talk in the Reddit DMs. I said yes and she then asked me if I have Discord. We now talk on Discord and I was shadowbanned on Reddit for some reason. (Anyway, I use Lemmy now, which has a much better community besides certain jerks and trolls which you’ll find on any somewhat large platform).

Since this was a while ago, we’ve talked a lot since then and she’s dealt with a lot. For starters, she’s Asian and lives in a very traditional Filipino community with Chinese heritage. Her entire family is not only traditional, but abusive, narcissistic, and neo-Nazis who support eugenics and Hitler. [I find it odd that Filipinos of Chinese descent would be this way but people are very strange.]

While stuck in her parents’ house being BEATEN, she can’t do much about her situation. While stuck in the house, she is incredibly motivated and wants to do all these things. Not only does she have a very long list of things, but she wants to become famous and good at EVERYTHING all at once, surpass her friends (who are either extremely talented or celebrities) and be the greatest person ever.

She always asks me if I think she’ll be the greatest person in the world, so I say yes. I don’t want to discourage her. Plus, I can’t predict the future. She may well become the greatest in the world. I know she’ll become very depressed and angry if I say no, and it’s simply rude.

I don’t know what to do or how to help besides comfort her. I don’t know how she can achieve her goal of becoming the greatest ever either.

It made me wonder, hearing from certain people who faced discrimination and harassment. They were hurt every single day intentionally and some of them had PTSD caused by their harm and became incredibly jumpy and traumatized.

Would that make the person who caused the harm evil?

I do

My sister Lena’s friend regularly screamed at her, made fun of people, was ableist, etc.

She is on-and-off nice and mean. Right now, she’s nice. Before, she hated Lena. Now, she likes Lena. In a few months, she’ll hate Lena again.

Lena’s friend believes nothing is ever her fault and refuses to get help. She is very secretive and guarded, and acts very paranoid. Along with her defensive behavior, this makes me think she’s sadly being abused if she isn’t just a jerk.

She has quite the ego, but I’m not sure if it can be justified. Lena wants to be her friend and help her even with her behavior.

(She apparently has NPD)

So, even though I used to have conservative views on society and the government, I supported liberal social rights such as minorities, LGBT, etc.

Never liked Trump or the venom spit by him and his followers. Always felt their views were too extreme and needlessly hated minorities.

I use Fediverse Obsever, which, for example, shows instances that allow signups, (ex: registration is disabled for lemmy.one) but am not sure of many instances where you don’t have to type a verification (besides lemmings.world). I think it’s good to have a typed verification, I’m just wondering which ones don’t.

It was a simple wedding with only our family who came and some friends of ours.

I’ve never actually been married, and to think it’d be with a beautiful woman who I’ve been friends with and lived next door to for 6 years (now live with).

My sister has been repeatedly harassed by a girl she’s been friends with, calling her disgusting, making fun of her disabilities, saying she’s superior to my sister, etc.

Every time my sister loses a game, she screams “HA HA!” despite apparently not caring about her. She’s also very biased towards her (obviously) and said autistic people are “dogs”.

She also makes fun of her for being “poor” (we are middle-class). My sister is among the smartest girls in her grade level, so I wonder if she’s harassing her for a reason like this.

I don’t understand how wanting to use feminine pronouns for someone femme-presenting and “wanting to be a woman” is “forcing an agenda”? Is respect an agenda now?

Also, it seems like it would give her dysphoria to use he/him pronouns on someone who wants to be the opposite gender (although I realize pronouns =/= gender)

Like, am I too sensitive and this is justified or is this dumb? My sister Lena’s ex "friends" hate her and act rude to her because Lena autistic, starts conversations with them, and says she likes their outfit occasionally, which they accuse her of doing "every hour".

Her friend Ashlyn accuses her of being a creepy stalker because Lena approached Ashlyn and her friends, said "Hey”, then remained quiet because it's RUDE to talk over ppl and when they're already talking. She then walked away and approached Ashlyn again to make conversation with her only to be told she's creepy.

"Oh, she's just upset"

"Oh, she's just abrasive like that"

"Ppl hate when they're spoken to. She's an introvert with depression, NPD, and isn't used to being greeted" (Most ppl only hate being spoken to by ppl they don't like).

"Oh, she doesn't HATE you, she just..."

Ashlyn is also a hypocrite who clearly hates Lena and treats ppl badly (but they suck it up bc they like her that much) and gets mad at ppl but does the same crap. She not only lies that everyone hates Lena, but tries to guilt-trip her into feeling bad for these "poor bullies" who hate Lena, find her and her conditions disgusting, and want her to suffer. This is a bit sick.

(I feel like these bullies are all just one girl pretending to be other ppl, which is quite dedicated of her)

Notes:

My sister Lena (14F) sent me (24F) these pictures (so “Me” is Lena, not me) and said I could use them as long as the names were blacked out for advice and such.

Ashlyn (blue, 14F) apparently has NPD, which could be a reason but doesn’t excuse her behavior. She is known for being an overall rude person, especially towards Lena, and is also known for exaggerating, giving vague explanations, not able to identify people and messing up timing on things (bringing up drama that happened “recently” when it either never happened or was weeks ago), and even lying that people don’t like Lena when they clearly do. Lena’s confusion makes me wonder if half of the stuff even happened, and if it did, possibly not in the way Ashlyn tried to convince her it did.

Due to Ashlyn being vague a lot, Lena will ask her what she’s talking about and Ashlyn will get mad and insult her.

I’ve also observed that people say that Ashlyn’s interactions and reasons to be angry at people is often odd and not natural, with stories often exaggerated and fabricated like I already said to prove a point.

Most people Lena talks to don’t even seem to be too fond of Ashlyn and say Lena was far kinder/more respectful than Ashlyn was, ever.

I’m never letting Ashlyn hang out with Lena on my watch again. This is how she usually interacts with Lena, and this current conversation is the last straw (from last night).

publicado de forma cruzada desde: https://lemmy.ml/post/27273176

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