this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024
42 points (100.0% liked)

Asklemmy

44149 readers
1233 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 

It can be low effort, passive-aggressive, insulting or derogatory towards your convictions.

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Suck_on_my_Presence@lemmy.world 3 points 38 minutes ago

I was deployed and got a box from my home unit that was basically just trash. I think it was supposed to be funny, but it was just a lot of scrap paper thrown into a box. Nothing written on them that was for me. Nothing to signal anything. Just a big box of trash that could have been nothing more than the recycling bin upended into it.

That was pretty heartbreaking.

[–] BlackRing@midwest.social 1 points 5 minutes ago

I had an aunt and uncle who, when I was a kid maybe 12, were not well off. They got my brother and I each this toyset that was like make pretend welding. It had a hand tool that, if I remember, let you weld with this soft plastic to make things with the parts in the kit.

It also had a chamber near the nozzle that spun and contained something that made a bunch of sparks.

Well... The thing kept zapping and burning me. Kinda hurt. So, being 12, I complained about it.

And of course, I was an ingrate for not liking the toy they could afford instead of a Lego set or something. The worst of it was I got what my parents meant, my aunt and uncle were kind of ashamed. But it burned me.

Hell I thought it was really cool, and even said so, but I couldn't keep playing with it due to, you know, my hand being red and kinda cut up.

Just bad times all around.

And no, no one suggested put a glove on, and it did not come with one.

[–] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 8 points 1 hour ago

Someone sent me what they referred to as a self-help DVD that was just some motivational speaker type of person invalidating my issues. A virus in the DVD also temporarily destroyed my friend's DVD player in the process of playing it.

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemm.ee 1 points 34 minutes ago

one of my buddies got a mtn dew. thats it

another got a playstation gift card, which would have been good but he didnt have a playstation

[–] Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world 14 points 3 hours ago

Oh fuck i have a long history of this...

My parents got me a cheap set of tools, pliers, screw drivers, level and a wood burner with no wood to burn at 10. My brother got a gameboy SP and Pokémon.

Two years later I got an electric shaver and Cologne. I didn't start growing facial hair until 17 and didn't have enough to need more than one pass with a razor until 26. Still have the Cologne, it's not awful but it's also not a smell that works for me.

14 I got a store made cake and $20. I can't eat the cake, the frosting makes my face hurt and that's been a problem since I was 5 so they know I can't eat the cake.

Basically, I didn't get a present for me until I met my wife at 30.

[–] ghost_towels@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 hours ago

Years ago my father in law gave me a Costco sized flat of Nanaimo bars. Like just wrapped it and that was that. I was so bummed as I thought it was a big coffee table book. I ended up cutting them all in half and freezing them, so we had treats through the year. My husband and I still joke about it. As we passed them in Costco last week he suggested I return the favour.

[–] ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca 26 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

I received a framed picture of my parents, from my parents. They said it was because I didn't have a picture of them hung up in my house.

[–] tailiat@lemmy.ml 20 points 3 hours ago

That's kind of hilarious. 😆

[–] meekah@lemmy.world 7 points 3 hours ago

My Dad once gifted me a bazinga shirt. I don't watch the big bang theory.

[–] JudahBenHur@lemm.ee 15 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

My mother-in-law gave me a booked called The Etiquette Edge which essentially explained how to be polite

[–] Arality@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

This is so funny to me! My wife recently got mad at me for comments I made on our anniversary. When I explained what I meant, she was totally fine. Communication is hard sometimes.

[–] JudahBenHur@lemm.ee 2 points 3 hours ago

Yeah I'd agree with that, but this is different. She was trying to help with what she saw as my ignorance about how much more positively people respond when you follow certain social rules.

She's a northern German woman who used to run a car dealership. I listen to punk rock. We get along but the things we value in life are pretty disparate.

At the call center I worked at, our Christmas bonus was a dress shirt with the company logo on it.

My wife wears it when she dyes her hair.

[–] CileTheSane@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

I've always been a computer/theatre nerd. When I was a teen my parents bought me a bike. I did not express nor have any interest in a bike, but I'm sure my mom felt I needed to go outside more and spend less time on the computer. A week or two later while upset at me about something else she complained that I haven't even used my new bike yet.

[–] Danitos@reddthat.com 2 points 34 minutes ago

That sounds a bit petty from you, at least from my POV.

No matter how nerdy you are, going outside is healtht, both physically and mentally. They got you a nice gift, IMO.

[–] FellowEnt@sh.itjust.works 7 points 3 hours ago

Top three would be my weird Christmas 'bonuses' from a previous employer. In order of weirdness: some fake notes (representing the companies record profits that year), a single bike pedal, and finally a spanner which had been spray painted orange.

[–] Hellnikko@lemmy.ml 10 points 3 hours ago

I was given 30 quarters that had letters and numbers on each one in a black velvet pouch. If you put them in a certain order, it had a message. The quarters went in year order. The message was a Bible passage according to Matthew. It was when Judas was given 30 silver for betraying Jesus.

The context, I told one of our friends that the gifter was trying to get with his wife while he was deployed. He denied and then made me feel like shit to insinuate such a thing. Turns out, it was true.

I still have the quarters so I could give them back some day.

[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 10 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Not the gift itself, but the response.

First of all, even before Christmas I said I'd prefer NO GIFTS at all. Regardless, my dad got me some inkjet HP printer. I thanked him for it, but asked him that we'd return it. I tried to be respectful, but regardless, he got mad at me and didn't talk with me for like 2 days.

Later he sent me the money for it and asked me to buy something for it and show him what it was. I do not know why I couldn't just keep it as extra money, but oh well, it had to be spent on something.
I got a refurbished ThinkPad for that. Pretty good device, by far beating value of HP inkjet. I even got it with a 2 year warranty (without extended) like with a new device, while only 1 year is required.

[–] bobs_monkey@lemm.ee 6 points 1 hour ago

My mom knows I'm always buying tools for work (electrician) and computer-related parts/devices. She still has trouble wrapping around the idea that I don't want (as much as I sincerely do appreciate the gesture) anything in those arenas due to specificity of requirement, that and most things of that nature tend to be expensive. She still buys little random things from Home Depot, like last year she bought this wrist cuff thing with magnets on it. Great idea on paper, but not in the field. At this point she's getting older so I kinda just humor her.

[–] POTOOOOOOOO@reddthat.com 46 points 5 hours ago (4 children)

People keep giving me steak house gift cards.

I'm a vegetarian. I can only eat a roll there.

[–] TherapyGary@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 hour ago

I'm vegan, and my agency gave me a gift card to Zaxby's, and it wasn't even loaded

[–] undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch 9 points 3 hours ago (2 children)

I’m vegan and the number of people who can’t figure out “no animal products” is astounding. I’m so tired of “no eggs? No dairy?” like yes bitch, I don’t fuck with animals.

People act like it’s rocket science.

[–] IMongoose@lemmy.world 6 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

What? Fish is an animal?? /s

[–] undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch 4 points 1 hour ago

How could I forget? It always blows people’s minds that I don’t eat fish, but before I was vegan I never liked fish anyway but no one had a problem with it until I went vegan.

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

To be fair, the person you're responded to said "vegetarian" not "vegan." But yes, otherwise, it isn't rocket science. My vegan boys are big fans of seitan.

[–] undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch 4 points 1 hour ago

Right. I guess people mix up the two a lot so for me it’s just easier to say “no animal products” plainly.

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Are you full vegan or just vegetarian?

If it's for Ouback Steakhouse, you could always have a Bloomin Onion if you're okay with eggs and milk.

But otherwise, yeah, not much else on the menu for ya.

[–] Addv4@lemmy.world 11 points 4 hours ago

Don't forget salad. Outback is largely one of the worst if you're vegetarian unfortunately. Most steakhouses at least have a few vegetable sides and can make a meal out of them.

[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 4 hours ago

Perhaps that's why, to annoy you.

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 3 hours ago

So I’m a trans guy and as a kid I was very obviously masculine, stereotypical tomboy. One of my aunts that married into the family gave me, maybe around age 5-7, a toy makeup kit. To this day I don’t know wtf she was thinking, because it wasn’t like she never met or saw me. Was it thoughtless or passive aggressive? Who can say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] EllE@lemmy.world 26 points 5 hours ago

I once got a picture of a really cool present from my dad, which he said was in the mail. Never got the present.

[–] Noel_Skum@sh.itjust.works 28 points 5 hours ago (2 children)

My mate’s little sister was sad and bemused one Christmas when their parents bought her a (single) Pom-pom. Why would you not buy a pair?

[–] ByteMe@lemmy.world 23 points 5 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Noel_Skum@sh.itjust.works 4 points 5 hours ago

Yeah - I’d always thought it would be called a Pom but just before posting I checked Wikipedia and apparently we’re both wrong. I know what you mean, though.

[–] darklamer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Why would you not buy a pair?

How rich are you!?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] DJDarren@thelemmy.club 13 points 5 hours ago

My gran once gave me a toilet brush. The base had penguins floating in blue liquid, but it was ultimately just a cheap toilet brush.

I gave her a beautiful marble maze.

I didn’t bother after that.

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago) (4 children)

My sister wanted me to be the Godfather to her children. She considered it a "gift."

I'm an atheist. I told her explicitly "Hey, you remember I'm an atheist, right?" Part of this whole Godfather business is making a promise to raise them religiously if their parent dies. I thought I was being considerate and kind by being honest that I did not want to be a Godfather because I could not in good conscience make such a promise.

Nope, I'm the bad guy, not the person who knew I was atheist and decided to not respect that at all anyway by asking me to be a Godfather to begin with.

[–] phoneymouse@lemmy.world 20 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago) (1 children)

God parents are supposed to care for the children, if the parents die. I think you shouldn’t overthink it. If you’re willing to fill that role, then raise the kids however you think is best. Accept the role gracefully as it is an honor and your sister is showing she loves and trusts you. Leave it at that.

As atheists, we have to acknowledge that most of the world isn’t yet on our level of thinking, but also that we don’t really have similar “concepts” for religious traditions that serve certain societal needs. God parents do serve a societal function. As an atheist, I can acknowledge that, accept that role, and play the part for those I love.

[–] tallricefarmer@sopuli.xyz 8 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah my siblings and friends also know i am an atheist, but that hasn't stopped us from naming each other godparents. It is just a promise to look after the child if something happens to the parents. I also try to make some monetary investment for the children

[–] FellowEnt@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 hours ago (2 children)

We solved this by having oddparents instead of godparents.

[–] bobs_monkey@lemm.ee 3 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 52 minutes ago)

Only if oddparents is prepended by fairly

E: spelling is hard

[–] meekah@lemmy.world 3 points 2 hours ago
[–] bradorsomething@ttrpg.network 5 points 3 hours ago

You could just call yourself a Sparent.

[–] faltryka@lemmy.world 14 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Was that their expectation of you, or just a common religious interpretation?

I know plenty of people who use the term and have no care for the religious history of it.

She's religious, that was the expectation.

[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 4 hours ago

Even that aside, what kind of gift is "You'll have to take care of my kids if I die."?

[–] CorrodedCranium@leminal.space 3 points 4 hours ago

XXL pajamas. I'm a medium bordering on small so I was swimming in them.

I think I also got a video game for a console I didn't have but the gesture was nice.

load more comments
view more: next ›