Asklemmy

I don't truly know what happens to us after death but I believe it's likely nothing so I want to have as much of something as possible. As I heard once, suicide is a permanent solution to what can only be a temporary problem. We all die in the end anyway.

Also, as far as lives go mine is pretty good. At least I think so. I don't have any health problems, I have a job that pays more than enough for me to live comfortably, a house with a lot of possessions I like in it, and a cat.

It could be better. There's a few things I can think of that would improve it. Some are pretty much impossible and some would be very difficult but there's some that are probably within my reach, I'm just not putting in the effort to try to attain them.

I stick around because (like some other people here) I want to live to see or even better help discovery the set of rules that underly the universe, see the stars even if just in photos, see what humanity is capable at its best, create anything that comes to mind, and learn everything I can. If the reason I dont want to live is the world around me (which it is) then I'd rather go out fighting, trying to change things rather than giving up outright (as a sidenote I wish someone created a place for people like this to meet and converse I see y'all scattered around the place but I can't find a singular congregation spot). I mean I have what could either be classified as very well thought out delusions of grandeur or long term plans for a sort of immortality and if there's the slimmest chance I can achieve that then I'm gonna shoot for it, and if I die trying then I get to die knowing I contributed to science in some hopefully big ways. So in summary I live to spite the world we live in and for the admittedly astronomically low chance I achieve my insane goal as the reasons for not living all relate to not having enough time and being restrained to a material world. Writing it out loud it's quite convoluted.

The most effective ways to die sound painful, and even for the "painless" ones, if you fuck it up you either suffer way too long or get slapped with insane medical debt and locked up in a loony bin for a ehile (usa). While I don't fear death itself or have a strong emotional attachment to the life I'm living right now, my life's in no way bad, so it's still an easy choice for me.

Because I will be vindicated and I will have my revenge and, to quote Violent J although I'm not a juggalo, "I'm not gonna die till I get my shit!"

I want to know what happens