this post was submitted on 23 Jul 2024
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"And Gore won the presidency. Heard advanced warnings of 9/11 (bush ignored these warnings), prevented 9/11, and took steps to reverse global warming. I got cocky, and thought maybe the other timelines were better than the official timeline I came from......and I see you guys elected donald trump??? As an overreaction from having the mildest president of black guys in office??? In my timeline we don't even wear pants! I mean, unless it's winter....but year, Ricks out, Dicks out! Oh, every male in my timeline is named Rick. Because they have a dick. And every female has the last name Micucci. No one knows why..."
I want in your timeline, I will gladly change my name and give up wearing pants.
Well, it's just like the theme song to Cheers goes.
Sometimes you wanna gooooo, where everybody knows your naaaaame. And every Friday is casual masturbation daaaaaay!!! You wanna be where people can see, who has the biggest pee-pee! You wanna go where everybody knows....your name...."
What? Is that not how your theme to cheers goes?
This timeline just gets better and better. Pantless Rick Danson, Rick Harrelson, and Mucucci Long.
No no. It's Shelly Mucucci. First name of all men are Rick. LAST name of women are Mucucci.
What about Rick Mucucci?
Not sure I know how to make a joke here without offending the trans community somehow. So all I'll say is that G-Scale is better than Ho-Scale!!!
So instead I offend the trains community!
ba-dum-chhhh
I'm not worthy for this golden timeline.