this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2024
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I am entirely sure it is area dependent and very very different if you are male presenting, but I have no idea how to deal with the extreme anxiety of public transit. The tube in London was great. The subway in NYC was confusing and anxiety inducing, but my phone made up most of the confusion. I am terrified of buses. I need a clear display of the next stops and hopefully a route posted, as I usually can't hear or understand any instructions over a speaker, if anything is broadcasted at all.
The worst part is being completely unable to relax. Having to wear headphones without music, and firmly not look at anyone to hopefully avoid harassment and block out the overwhelming noise. I can't even draw on my iPad in peace without someone wanting to look at it and ask questions. I have to make sure I am not in the way, don't take up too much room, and don't miss some cue that I was supposed to do something. I hate being a woman. I hate that being in public is an ordeal and I can't just go for a walk without having to prepare battle gear of sorts to protect myself.