Programmer Humor

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i thought she'd be happy for me (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by aidan@lemmy.world to c/programmerhumor@lemmy.ml

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[–] aidan@lemmy.world 0 points 1 year ago (7 children)

Thanks for the sympathy- my mom hasn't been very emotionally stable for my whole life. She's not perfect and sometimes I think she's wrong, but I know she loves and cares about me

[–] Contramuffin@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Oh, just because someone is abusive or unsupportive doesn't mean that they don't love you. It just means that their interactions aren't healthy for you and you need to establish boundaries.

Regardless, I hope that you're doing well. I don't know what your project is, but I can certainly tell you that it's much more impressive than anything I've made

[–] aidan@lemmy.world 0 points 1 year ago (2 children)

That's true, but I feel like the internet is quick to brand people having moments of failure as abusive. Nobody is perfect, and I can't expect my parents to be perfect. Imo, calling my mom abusive is far too extreme.

[–] Sivaru@lemmy.world 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes, in this world there is no one who wants what is good for you more than your parents. Many people forget that, if your parents have problems, you need to take care of them.

[–] bleph@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

I don't agree with this in all cases.

True, parents usually have a deeply ingrained emotional need to protect and nurture their children but:

Not all parents do. Narcissists have children all the time. When they do, they cloak their emotional vampirism in 'love' like they do in all relationships.
Even parents with the best intentions have to work HARD not to pass on their generational traumas, abuses, and bad habits.
Only the child can truly know what will fulfill them as a person. Parents often substitute what they wanted for their younger selves for the child's best interest.

For those still thinking I have no idea what I am talking about and you and your parents are different... please look into "enmeshment" for your own sake

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