this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2024
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A Boring Dystopia
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"If you're starving, we'll use an API with your bank to charge you $10 more than your entire net worth. In that moment we'll offer you a credit card with a 37% adjustable interest rate that only adjusts up to cover the overage (but credit card takes 6-8 business days to process, so you will go over). We'll then be left with no choice but to also process an overdraft fee on your bank account with daily penalties for the overage since you are being irresponsible.
And we'll use AI to generate a picture of everyone you love in a room laughing at you, because fuck you. By overdrafting, you triggered a clause in our user agreement (that you agreed to) which states that we can charge you whatever we think it's fair for that picture. The picture will then regenerate each month, indefinitely, on an auto subscription, unless you cancel by hand delivering a paper cancellation form to our cancellation office in Guam."