this post was submitted on 02 Aug 2024
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Where did you end up if you're willing to share? I grew up in what was considered a pretty crime addled place, and have lived in several major cities over my lifetime but I legitimately have never had the level of issues that I have had out West. People got some real shit ass fucking head trauma going on. But I also do get the idea of - if everything in your life is shit, you burn the world around you. It just sucks, because instead of helping people out here, they throw them some food and leave them to live and die like dogs. Worst yet, when I was working directly with the homeless it always seemed like the shittiest people who were great at manipulation were the ones who got into housing programs. But I am being kind of extreme in the sense that I know one very special person who works their ass off who got housing and they are absolutely amazing. And there are a couple of people who are no-to-low drama decent folks. But a majority are total scum of the Earth shit heads.
I agree with you though. Especially on account of having gotten our place shot up by some asshole in some bull that we were not related to at all. Still fucks me up, and it's because people are lenient af out here and it's trickle-down shittyness.
My choices are generally not popular with an American audience. There's a lot of propaganda in the world, everyone does it, but the US is the best at it so it can be very difficult to see things outside those borders.
I live all over the world, still do. But I spent over 20 years in the US primarily. I lived in low crime, affluent areas. But the low crime is still absurdly high crime, but is normalized. I won't share all my story but being victimized for my possessions was annoying, but not the end of the world. That's what insurance is for. My breaking point was the second time I was almost murdered by the police for being the wrong colour in my own neighbourhood. I'm talking guns pointed at me for no reason and lots more I don't discuss.
My primary residence is now in the Middle East. Almost immediately, most people make a confused face and the first questions are usually "why" followed by "aren't you worried about..." and then a laundry list of manufactured issues that don't actually exist, or exist equally where they live.
The bottom line is that my front door is unlocked and stays unlocked. When I go the park, beach, mall, restaurant, wherever I can reserve a spot by dropping my wallet or cell phone and walking away without worry. I have all the modern conveniences of the USA and more. I use an app on my phone and a fuel truck comes to me to fill up my car. Leave your keys on the windshield like everyone else and they will fill you up as you're elsewhere. Use the app and get laundry services washed, dried, and folded with pickup from your house and drop off with tip for the cost of a cup of coffee. No tipping culture of 50%, a dollar or two is plenty. I can buy a meal in a restaurant that feeds 4 people for about $5 with apps, entrees, dessert, and tip. I can also buy a stupid gold steak for $2000. The choice is mine.
Public transport works. Food from every part of the world is minutes away. A woman can walk by themselves at 3am with no fear.
I'm currently on a holiday to a different country a few hours away. My door is still unlocked.
When I talk to Americans that have made the move they almost all say the same thing. It takes a few weeks for the constant fear and guard to start to drop. It takes about 2 years before you start to live without that burden.
Every time I am in the US it is just worse and worse. Crime, political discourse, and just general everyday anger between people in every interaction. Walking down a sidewalk or road rage or unfriendly staff, just general anger. When you're around it constantly, you never really notice it. You only notice the extreme outbursts. But when you go somewhere that's finally peaceful, you then become aware of the constant noise and the huge outbursts.
Only other thing I'll mention as this is way too long already, is that the excuse of "I can't just pack up and move" is just an easy excuse. You absolutely can. It isn't easy. It can be isolating if you're going by yourself. But you can. One of my grandparents fled from war with nothing but a single suitcase for 3 children and the 2 adults. Lost everything they had to get a better life and start fresh. Another grandparent immigrated with a whole ship worth of crap. My parents immigrated yet again with moving trucks. I immigrated by air and a couple suitcases filled with everything in the world I hold important.
It takes more money and privilege to immigrate with your possessions. But that's a luxury upgrade. It isn't a requirement.
Oh yeah, no I hear you. I'm mixed and the police have fucked with me a time or two. But I am like mystery meat, so like...idk? Sometimes things are chill, sometimes things are bad. I can imagine in wealthier areas if you're not seen as a novelty you're probably a pretty easy target. Sounds like you might be mixed too, maybe not ethnically but culturally? Or maybe both, cause who the hey knows? I am going to guess part-Palestinian? On account of hearing similar stories, but then again the refugee story is pretty similar across the board. Could be Somali just as easily. Or if they're immigrating by land second go round - Viet or Korean Venezuelan. Okay, yeah no. A lot of refugee stories can come from the same pot. Ugh. Nevermind, I'm gunna stop playing guess-who of ethnicity.
I come from immigrants (both sides) too, but I have no emigrated myself. I have wandered all over the US. But I've only traveled NA as a whole. On account of being small, relatively impoverished (although I'm doing okay right now), a vagina-holder, and incredibly gay. My own country wasn't here for me, and I don't have faith in many others being there still. I agree you get it from all sides in this country, but I don't really know anywhere there's a collection of humans in which this isn't true. And collectivism is beautiful, and homogeneity can make for easier politics, but I also believe it carries some real issues too. I'd say the simplest one I've experienced in my own life is that it's very easy to be manipulated in the name of the greater good. As the child of a collectivist individual. But I will also say I think individualistic societies can be so self-centered and broken up that even the family unit can be comprised of "a group of strangers, all living under one roof as roommates." I also think there is a "forever young" sentiment that gets passed around and I have seen a lot of people never grow out of being in their late-teens/early-twenties even with dependents. And I am not saying don't have fun. But it tears me up inside when I see kids getting abused (and I was gunna go in on some of the stuff I've seen but I just waved it off because it's hard to express in a cohesive way but for sure I've seen people at the bottom work their asses off to make sure their children have better lives (and in turn-their children's children) or being totally-self absorbed drug-addicts who destroy everything around them). I also don't have children, so the only skin in the game I have here is just you know...being a humanist.
I think...the media machine is huge and I get what you're saying because America is a huge-producer of "culture." But I would argue that there's equal footing in a couple of other countries (predominantly because culture-wars are easy to spin-up in these modern times). Anddddd, like you said - every culture does it. I gave up on what any of it means. And a huge part of why I made a PieFed account was to avoid seeing so much spammy bullshit. Because I think most news articles are just chatter. And a huge reason why I wanted nothing to do with Reddit is because it was ALL bullshit. But it was also a place where people....once conversed? Sometimes you would get a little drip-feed of conversation among a sea of stupid joke-y responses. It was so fucking cringy.
But a ton of stuff is mind control. I wrote more but I just trashed it cause I hit the limit. Eh! Either way, thank you for your response. I am glad that you have found peace in your life. Because no matter where you are, it's good to find your fit.