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Classic paladin (s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com)
 
 

Classic paladin
@rpgmemes@ttrpg.network

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This comic follows on from the Previous comic which will almost certainly provide context.

Zero consideration given to the possibility that Konsi realized this herself and said it deliberately.

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Sums it up pretty good (s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com)
 
 

Sums it up pretty good
@rpgmemes@ttrpg.network

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Our DM is ready to kill our monk. If he can find any damage the monk can't dodge, reduce, or straight up ignore.

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Hear ye, hear ye! Tales From the Tables is back with episode 41, and the 5th and final part of the Devil's Due arc. And boy, was it difficult to draw this one. Not in technical terms, of course... but mostly in emotional ones. Things may seem dark., but please keep in mind it always seems darkest before dawn. Have faith, everyone.

Also, there's some really big reveals coming soon, in the next few episodes :)

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Rogues beeing Rogues (s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com)
 
 

Rogues beeing Rogues
@rpgmemes@ttrpg.network

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Our party has been investigating the Church of the Macho One (aka the Church of Randy Savage), which is our Paladin's Church, after receiving information of a demon that our paladin ticked off a long time back, had been influencing things and may be linked to the death of the previous head of the church.

After a short investigation, dispelling an illusion of the Paladin's parents, and checking the guard records, the captain of the church guard drops his cover and attacks us and the new Macho Pope. However, as the Captain screamed his head off as the lair actions triggered, I, being closest to her, noticed odd whispers around the Macho Pope.

Turns out she was the demon in question under Shapechange. The fight dragged on and we had a couple close calls, with the Paladin having to counterspell a Power Word Kill, the Rogue avoiding being plane shifted to the Abyss, and the Bard dropping a Fire Storm from her instrument to take out the guard captain.

The Demon, a powered up Marilith, was drawing power from a gem that she had captured holy souls in, which lead my Warlock to take the initiative in summoning an Arisen Nightmare (A celestial Nightmare with all it's Fire replaced with Radiant) and gave him the duty of breaking the gem. Overall he only got one hit in on he because he missed his others, but that one hit was a crit with most of the damage being Bludgeoning, which the gem was vulnerable to.

The party followed suit, including the Barbarian who was grappled in the Marilith's coils and eating a lot of damage herself, but managed one last crit on the Gem, which shattered it and caused 85d6 Radiant to both her and the Demon, ending the fight and us having to quick Revivify the Barbarian.

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Our DnD discord group has a whole ass 'out of context' channel. Best decision we've ever made, granted half of them is my character, the party clown. Here are some other bangers over the years:

  • "She knows how to ride a clippity clop."
  • "Ah so you want it so when you die there's a magical turfwar over your body."
  • "the horse is a horse....i dont think he understands the concepts"
  • "It's not Delivery, it's Human Trafficking!"
  • "Don't tell my dad I died for toenails"
  • "It's pulsating. It shouldn't be because it's a fucking rock."
  • "Jesus Christ! I mean... Bahamut Jr!"
  • "There was a scary forest!" "SCARY FOREST IS NOT AN ANSWER"
  • "That's Renn! He's like a dead squirrel."
  • "Who wants to do coke with the illithid?"
  • "I agree, other voice in my head."
  • "When a corpse bee and another corpse bee love each other and don't dance..."
  • "I emotionally abuse you and you bring me waffles. Thanks babe."
  • "Does your house have a garden?" "Probably."
  • "Should I go... unwhisk it?"
  • "I heard it from the Oracle Beyoncé."
  • "HOW DO YOU LISTEN TO AN EAR?!"
  • "I'm sorry Renn, I love you, but fuck the rich."
  • "I forgot that we have one brain cell in the party and it currently blinked away."
  • "We can have one little terrorism. As a treat."
  • "Hey, it's not our fault this Earth Elemental is made of door."
  • "Roll a d20." "10." "...fuck." "Does that fuck up your plans or mine? (Panicking)" "Yours." "...fuck!"
  • "If you would be inclined for a little adventure today, would you mind following me? Oh and it's mandatory because I've already made arrangements."
  • "Can we just like acknowledge that she just did the anime "Oh ho ho ho!" laugh when you called her out on that?"
  • "You ripping peoples faces off, that's entirely on you. Get some help."
  • "I'm-uh-w-Lady.... I'm not above hitting a woman."
  • "I have cocaine, does that count?"
  • You ate a goodberry so you should be full for the rest of the day" "True" "Well you can be full and a fatass" "Just shut up and play your silly little game with your silly little characters and don't come for me like that"
  • "Does a 26 hit?" "... fuck you.".
  • "Why doesn't Misty have a mustache?"
  • "No matter who you play you gotta either fuck with his body or his heart!"
  • "The undead not dead thing is right" "Please call me Renn" "I'll never remember that" "It's literally shorter"
  • "Why must I be surrounded by lesbians? ... I fear your kind." (For the record this was said by both a gay character and player)
  • "Can I pick up Renn? He's a twink, right?"
  • "You're a second rate duelist with a third rate meal"
  • "Just gives me the confidence that she would choke me"

Okay sorry I ended up pasting way more in than I expected.... I just love this group and don't get to share these with anyone. Just such ridiculous nonsense.

Edit: Also I just remembered. I actually do have the context for that 'no no thing' line. That one is mine from my 7'2 barbarian aarakocra jokey boy. We recorded parts of sessions and caught the no no thing bit. Here if you wanna listen to it. although I don't blame you the slightest if you don't.

I've also got a stupidly long soundcloud clip of highlights from a game a couple months ago here. It includes a bunch of the quotes pasted above.

Check out !outofcontextdnd@lemmy.world for more!

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Dynamic Duo incoming. (s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com)
 
 

Dynamic Duo incoming.
@rpgmemes@ttrpg.network

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Source is Slackwyrm comics by Josh Wright

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