Memes

Hey some of us are autists that somehow evaded a diagnosis and therefore any kind of supportive treatment or therapy. We're doing our best OK?

Two weeks ago, I saw the loner at the table of an event. Went to go talk to them because they were alone for a while.

In less than 10 minutes, they made a offensive joke that would have insulted half the people here, and complained about their living situation unprompted.

IDK man, the people with no or few friends tend to be weird but not really bad in any meaningful way: socially awkward, shy, odd interests, neurodivergent etc. Difficult to get to know, plain and simple. People with a lot of friends are often worse people, manipulative and/or have a transactional attitude to relationships

I tried to befriend a friendless dude in college. Found out he was friendless because he went around asking women what their "cunt diameter" was. Even women professors!

I'm that lonely guy. One friend, love him because he stuck around when my mental health was at its worst. Eventually I finally got a psychiatrist, my first one, who told me most of my toxic negative attitudes and behaviors were stemming from my mental illnesses. It took a couple years to get through therapy and monthly psychiatrist appointments but where I am now is... Well still pretty awful but at least I can give my best friend the space he needs, and function without the anxiety and panic attacks that were caused by overthinking every single message or lack of message. My medication regime is strict and full of pills, but hey, doing better then I was last year. I can't forgive the people who left when my mental health got out of control but I do understand why they made their choices. It hurt and made my depression a lot worse. The only thing that kept me sane was my last friend. He stuck around and helped. Im still lonely and want more friends, but it's a slow healing process. More friends might make the social anxiety worse, or it might help. Not really certain I wanna flip that coin. Taking small steps though.

Whelp that's enough oversharing with complete strangers. Have fun everyone!

I used to be the guy that knew everyone, introducing my friends to others, and others to others.

These days, I have maybe 2 friends.

The good friends I once had believe everything they see on Facebook.

I just couldn't anymore.

Met a guy at the local boardgame event. Got to talking about how he was always driven out of gaming groups and nobody invites him anymore and a lot more of "oh woe is me" stuff. I recognized a bit of my younger self in him and how used the same schtick to get sympathy and social interaction before I learned how toxic this behaviour is. I wanted to try and mentor him out of this self-defeating behaviour so I invited him to my place.

When he came in treated my family like a complete asshole. Couldn't make them suffer for one dude.

I'm copying this from a comment I made on a thread about ghosting people.

I ghosted someone I knew on Discord. They were exceptionally clingy. Like message me four times a day, every day, without me messaging in between. Message me the second I get online. It was so annoying. Constantly asking me if I was mad at them after I didn't answer them immediately. Even after I told them I wasn't mad and not to think I am if I don't answer. I told them so many times that the only thing that was annoying me was them thinking I was annoyed when I don't answer immediately. Just so so pouty all the time. I couldn't handle it.

I took a break from Discord for other reasons and when I came back I just ignored them. I couldn't handle it anymore.

From the way other people talked to them on servers and things they said, I get the feeling this is a common pattern with them. They start to make some friends, then get super clingy and sobby if you don't answer them right away and people get frustrated and stop talking to them. Which sucks, but, I'd told them so so so many times exactly what they were doing that was annoying me and they never stopped. It's so infuriating for someone to just be so sad about something and for you to try and tell them in no uncertain terms "I'm not mad at you, but when you think I am mad because I don't answer right away it makes me annoyed. Just stop that. That's all I'm upset about."

not to brag, but i've graduated from not befriending friendless people to driving away friended people who try to be friends with me

less people, ~~less~~ fewer drama

It’s the risk you take. I’ve met some of the most interesting people this way. If you go into it with an open mind and understand that usually it’s not going to work out, you’ll be better for it.

I'm the dude with no friends because of the BPD relationship spiral.

Meet someone new. They're cool. Like them. Hang out all the time. Start to hate everything about them. Leave/Drive them away. Meet someone new. They're cool...

Happened to me a few years ago, started in a new office and one of the guys seemed cool so we talked more frequently. Ended up helping him get the apartment upstairs from me because his lease was expiring and carpooled to work. That's when the clinginess started, couldn't go half a day without him always texting or calling over stupid shit and borderline unhinged behaviors. I distanced myself real quick from him. The final straw was when he had asked what "village" my girlfriend was from in Brazil, then doubled down when I called him out for assuming she was from some uncontacted Amazonian tribe. "Well you havent been there yet so you don't know lol" yeah ok fuck you, dude. Haven't talked to him since, even though he still lives upstairs.

Anxiety sucks, or is there different reasons why I don't have irl friends?

im the second picture...

There are a lot of lonely people in the world. Too many of them deserve it.