this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2024
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Relationships

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I have a really bad habit of getting into relationships with people ,who are nice at first then just stop caring . I listen to peoples feelings and am a very honest and open person . I know when to stop speaking and for some reason I don't know why I could work and also cook the next days meals the night before on my workdays and clean the mess I made while still cleaning my partners mess when I get home and it would never be enough . on my days off I dont have a pleasing people issue I just like lots of tasks it makes me happy and I still always have time for myself and my partner of course. I give my partner space and listen to their feelings as well as just being there for them . What am I doing wrong? I always just say if you need something or want something to be different just tell me and I can make it work if my partner says they want tondo something like helo cook or work or anything else I'm cool with it . I'm an easy to please respectful person I hold doors and have manners. I don't know I guess I just want some advice on what I should do after I heal from my breakup? I just am gonna take some time to myself and reflect and do some self improvement . Thanks,

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[–] You_are_dust@lemm.ee 4 points 4 months ago (5 children)

I think this is a little vague to offer much constructive advice on. Do you have an example of what is happening? Maybe I overlooked something in your post, but you talk a lot about you and what you do for a relationship, but not what is happening in the other end. What do you mean that the other person stops caring? You say that you communicate that if your partner needs something, you tell them to ask. Are you asking when your needs are not being met?

[–] AverySalsedo021@lemmy.world 0 points 4 months ago (3 children)

I'm sorry for being vague what 8 mean by syop caring is they just ignore me altogether and refuse to express their feelings and they tend to become really distant , I understand that I'm also at fault for being old school about stuff . Its almost like they always have better things to do and end of just leaving without any explanation or signs other than just distancing themselves, I don't get it but I'm also I'm my 20's so I have a lot to learn cause I'm young still If you know what I mean .

[–] You_are_dust@lemm.ee 1 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Are you dating about your same age? Maybe it's a maturity thing and you're choosing people that just aren't interested in relationships that require effort. You need to find someone that values the same things as you in a relationship and maybe you're just missing the mark because the people in your dating pool aren't there yet.

[–] AverySalsedo021@lemmy.world 0 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Yeah I stay no more than a couple years apart from my own age

[–] You_are_dust@lemm.ee 1 points 4 months ago

Maybe just give things time. You're young. There's no rush. I don't know why they may all seem the same, but we tend to repeatedly end up with people that are similar in personalities. That's my experience anyway. You have to consciously break that cycle.

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