this post was submitted on 06 Apr 2024
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I get where they’re coming from, but it’s still not great being a guy and only getting vague signals that you’re trying to piece together. Ghosting is also another issue that’s honestly just disrespectful.
While it may ultimately be those man children who ruin it for everyone, some upfront honesty is generally very appreciated.
If a woman gives me vague signals it's a sign that she's not right for me. Everything other than a "hell yes" is a no. Which is fine, I'm okay with being alone. But I'm not going to chase someone who hints that they're into me, because I'm too damn old for that shit.
This must be said more frequently. This is the correct attitude. You may be alone longer, but you haven't terrorized anybody. It's a net win.
I feel like signals of interest are being conflated with Consent/approval of a date here
No, it's not. If I'm talking to someone and they look disinterested, that's not a "hell yes." If they're standing there while their four-top is waiting on refills, that's not a "hell yes."
A "hell yes" is them asking me questions, or sharing a relatable story. It's them smiling and looking at me when I talk. A "hell yes" is me asking "would you like to talk alone" and her saying "hell yes."
Get used to being alone. Learn to love its freedom and spontaneity, and then find someone who's better than that who says "hell yes."
Well I'm just saying I've had not hell yes signals turned into a hell yes date very quickly when I asked them out. Of course I always ask them very open ended so they have all the chance to say no but I got a "yes of course!"
Sometimes people are just a bit shy or afraid, I know I probably give of pretty meh signals even if I'm crushing hard.
I agree it's very important not to fool yourself but sometimes you gotta ask to know for sure and I don't think it's that black and white all the time
E: love a good Convo down vote no reply.. weak sauce.