this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2024
185 points (97.0% liked)

Asklemmy

43940 readers
424 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy ๐Ÿ”

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] OceanSoap@lemmy.ml 26 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Honestly? Kinda lonely. I'll be 40 in a few months. I'm a woman, if the perspective matters .

I was engaged to the man I thought I'd marry and have kids with, but it didn't turn out to be the case, and although I learned how to choose better and what to look out for, I also wonder if I'm ever going to get to have a family of my own. It's been 6 years now since that fell apart, and I had to do a lot in that time to get back onto my feet, but the few relationships I've had since then are fleeting. Men seem afraid of commitment now, and it's hard not to completely fall to the idea that I'm just too old, which is what society is consistently screaming at me.

I don't feel old.

I am tired of searching though. At some point I will get to where I'm too old and that makes me sad to think about.

[โ€“] tamal3@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

At some point we're too old to have biological children, yes, but my 72 year old father has been in a new relationship for about a year and they seem super happy together.

(Edited for clarity.)

[โ€“] stiephelando@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

40 isn't too old for kids. Plenty of people have kids at that age and they're doing just fine.

[โ€“] Steak@lemmy.ca 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

It's just more difficult when you're older.

[โ€“] stiephelando@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Yes, that's true, but at that age you're financially more stable and have more patience than a 20y. We had our kids at about 30 and I think that's probably the best age for it.

[โ€“] Steak@lemmy.ca 1 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah I had my kids at 30 also. Definitely agree