this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2024
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[–] DoucheBagMcSwag@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (5 children)

This has a Ryan George (Pitch Meeting) written all over it

News: here are STARTLING MORTALITY RATES that you definitely did NOT ask for while you wait for the weather that we definitely promise is coming! But first a word from our sponsor

User: you're right I really didn't ask for th---

Ad: "HI HELLO THERE I'm the pharma ad -- THIS COULD (possibly) KILL YOU!"

User: oh god why would I want that? --

Ad: So you won't be depressed ya silly goose!"

User: [Gestures to "News"] these people give you... Money?...-

News: Yeeah yeeah yeah yeah!

News: enjoy watching it every break until you actually feel depressed! *ARE YOU SAD YET??

User: when are you going to get to that segment that you keep teasing over and over which is very effectively keeping me in engaged on your platform?

News: heyshutup HERE'S THE SAME AD AGAIN!